𝐓𝐀𝐔𝐍𝐓 - A DSMP Ship Book

Don't Threaten Me with a Good Time | 4

sparky (: 

Schlatt opened his eyes, staring up at a unfamiliar white ceiling. His head throbbing, he felt like he was just fucking stabbed multiple times in the face.

He couldn't remember anything from the night before, only that he went to a bar, without his best friend, which was odd considering that Quackity would always go to the bars to make sure Schlatt didn't fuck anything up.

He sat up, holding his head with one hand. He realized that he wasn't wearing any clothes other than boxers. The explanation came to him: he slept with some woman.

Or at least, that was his explanation until Wilbur walked into the room.

"WHAT THE FUCK!" He yelled, scooting back onto the bed, hitting the headboard. "Calm down," Wilbur said, stepping towards Schlatt carrying a water and Advil. "We didn't sleep together, let me explain. Here, take this." Wilbur handed Schlatt the Advil and set the water on the night-stand. Schlatt dry-swallowed the Advil, awaiting Wilbur's explanation.

"You just got really drunk, and I didn't know who to call so you crashed at my place. You got shit all over your clothes so you took them off and climbed into bed with me, so," he said, scratching the back of his neck nervously. "And you didn't push me out of the bed? You could have at least given me a change of clothes, gay-ass," Schlatt replied.

"I'm not fucking gay," Wilbur stated. He bent down and then threw a pile of fabric at the ram. "Here are your clothes, dumbass."

Schlatt grumbled pulling the clothes off himself and into his arms. "You didn't need to throw it at me," the shorter muttered, pulling a sock from off his horns.

"I'm gonna change now," he said, jumping off the bed and throwing his clothes on. Wilbur just stood there, creepily watching. It made Schlatt uncomfortable, but he didn't say anything.

"Where are my keys?" He asked once he and Wilbur had made their way to Wilbur's small-ass kitchen. "Right there," Wilbur said, taking the keys off the kitchen counter and handing them to Schlatt. "I drove your car since I just used Lift to get there," he explained, "there was a lot of Porn magazines in the glove box, they seemed very gay, Princess."

"You just accused me of being gay yet you called me "princess," what the fuck. It's Quackity's car, not mine," Schlatt protested. "So what? He's gay?" Wilbur inquired, raising an eyebrow. "That's not my place to tell you, why would it matter anyways, you got the hots for him?" Schlatt joked, opening up Wilbur's door and stepping outside the apartment into the 80s styled hallway.

"I don't like Quackity," the Brit defended, "why? Do you like him? Has he said anything about me?"

Schlatt chuckled, shaking his head. "You sure you don't like him? And I don't like Q, he's like a brother to me. The only thing he has said about you is about how gay you are."

Wilbur rolled his eyes, leading Schlatt down to the lobby. "I was always jealous of how close you two were," he commented. "Huh?" Schlatt followed Wilbur into the underground parking garage that the blue 2008 Honda Civic was located at.

"You two were - and still are - so close. Like soulmates close. I remember watching you and Quackity fight on break one time, and then you two stopped talking for maybe 30 seconds and immediately start joking again. I never had that with anyone, even my brothers," Wilbur responded, clarifying the confusion that Schlatt's dumbass had.

"Oh," Schlatt said, "Quackity and I have been friends since - I dunno? - daycare? His parents hated me because I wasn't "a good influence" on him, but eh." He shrugged his shoulders.