A court of shadow and spying (Azriel X OC)

The Process

And so it went on for a while. We trained and hardly spoke, but the shadow singer had grown more attached to me than I wanted to admit. Our daily trips to the steppes brought me forward physically, I now knew how to defend myself, I no longer felt completely helpless when I was being abused. I knew I had the strengh and the wit to overpower them, if something should happen i did not approve. And Azriel seemed to see it the same way. Even though he pushed me harder and longer than usual, I felt good afterwards. I finally had time to concentrate on something other than my job. Although I had never actually described this as such. I also took fewer clients, an advice from Azriel and Ryshand, but ones with a lot of influence. Many I met only to talk, because some lonly men were rather fond of talking to me rather than using me, and in the shithole of a life, it felt like they needed someone as desperatly as me. And so I won piece by piece the trust of those who wanted to confide in me. And since the Shadowsinger also began to teach me how to spy, I managed everything much easier.

'First', he had said,
'you don't certainly have to sleep with them to get information.'
It was clearly expressed and I was almost ashamed of the expression, but I didn't let myself fall back that far.I did all of this for me and my better future. And if there had been something else I could have done to earn my money, I would have dropped everything immediately. But there were still too many things that kept me in the city. And now, of course, the deal with my High Lord. The spymaster had told me we would meet with him very soon, but everything had to be planned in advance so that everything could proceed calmly and quietly. I was curious who exactly I had to approach and how exactly I should get the information from the people, but there would probably always be a first time for everything.

But when the Shadowsinger landed a strike on me I was called back to life. Sometimes it happened that I was lost in thought during our training sessions. However, I could not afford that with him. I had the feeling, he noticed how absent I was and then used this as his advantage. I groaned because my back hit the floor, hard.
'Stop being so inattentive. Otherwise something like this wouldn't happen', he said and held out his hand to me. For a brief moment, I thought about pulling him down with me, but I discarded the idea because I remembered his physique. It would take more than me to knock him down. I took his hand and heaved myself upward.
'Is something wrong?' he asked as he went on the attack.
'Oh no, everything is fine, why do you ask?' My sarcasm was hard to miss as I struggled to keep his blows off me. The spymaster only raised his eyebrow, sternly convinced that I would explain my statement. Otherwise we never talked about ourselves or what was bothering us, it was enough that I could release my frustration and anger during the training sessions with him. We both weren't much of a talkers, but he seemed to warm up to me more. I did not know how to feel about that.

'I'm just having a bad day.' I said grumpily and countered his blow.
'Then you seem to have a lot of them', he then said, with a spark of fun behind his hazel eyes.
'Yes, I do. Why don't you go around Hewn City and sell your body? I'm sure you'd feel better', I said icily back and landed a punch to his side. He didn't even flinch. I realized he provoked me for a reason, so I could let my frustation and stress out. He knew I would never talk about this topic if I wasn't pushed into it. He seemed to have studied me quite well and it made me more angry to know, that he figured me out that easliy.
'And imagine what it's like to know that nothing else will get you out of this goddamn town but that. That you can't do anything but offer yourself up and let all the old, disgusting men grab you because it's the only thing that's valued there. So why should I also have a bad day, should be normal for me by now huh?', I returned spitefully and hardly noticed that I had run into his offensive. I only felt that he had me in his hostage when my back was pressed against his chest and he held my hands crosswise in front of me. It would have been easy to escape this position, and yet I could not bring myself to move away from his warmth. From his breath on my neck that I had not felt so close since then.

I took a deep breath in and out to calm myself.
'I'm sorry', I said softly as I leaned more against him. 'I didn't mean it that way.'
'I bet these were the most truthful words you have spoken to me.' , he whispered in my ear.
'And I know you didn't mean it badly. And believe me, I hate it as much as you do, to have to see how all the women there are used, deceived and made submissive. We have been trying to abolish the old ways for decades, but the men are just too stubborn and too eager for power to trust us.'
He paused for a moment, as if he had to restrain himself from saying something.
'I just want you to understand, we...'
He took another breath, his chest rising against my back.
'We're not happy about your situation either, and every time we talk about it, we debate how to get you out of here faster. We have friends who have experienced similar things, we may not know what it is like but- we can imagine it. So trust me that we will do everything possible to get you out of here. Okay?'
I could only manage a nod. My hands had started to tremble almost imperceptibly when he had confessed all this to me. I would never have thought it possible that someone cared about me. I had only known it from my biological father, but he had disappeared when I turned 14. I took a breath and closed my eyes for a moment. Then I pushed myself away from him and smiled slightly.

'Thank you', I murmured softly, but abysmally sincere. It touched me that they thought about me like that, as if I were a good friend.
'Don't thank us, it's obvious.', said Azriel as he launched another attack.

After another hour, I was sweaty and so exhausted that I thought I would have to throw up somewhere. Today we had probably driven it a little too far. I leaned my hands on my thighs and tried to get my breaths back under control.
'Rhysand wants to see you at the end of the week', the Shadowsinger said carefully, as if he expected a reaction from me that he didn't like.
'Really?' I asked curiously. Finally, finally, it was time to get to work.
'So you think I'm ready to be his spy?' I grinned at him, which I couldn't help doing. He scowled at me, but I could read a hint of a smile on his lips.
'Well, you still have a lot to learn and you'll never be as good as me, but there's always a first time, isn't there?' he teased back, which brought a funny but warm feeling in my stomach.
'Funny.'
But I couldn't help smiling.

'Where will we see him?' I asked again.

'In Velaris, our home.'