Spin the Bottle (To Be Deleted)

16 ~ She Always Had Control

|JAMIE|

Placing my pencil down, I stand up and walk through the isle of desks. Mr. Truman briefly acknowledges my presence as I place my test on the small pile of completed finals. With all the drama I've fallen victim to, I didn't get a chance to study as much as I wanted. Receiving anything less than an A sucks, but at least I'll still score above average. A few chairs screech and footsteps approach behind me. Turning on my heels, I maneuver past my classmates back to my seat.

Leo's eyes are burning a hole in the side of my head and it takes a lot of leg shaking to stop myself from meeting his gaze. Last time we locked eyes he walked away. Malia is currently holding his phone hostage, so it makes sense he wants to talk to me. I just don't know how I feel about all of this.

Never mind, scratch that. I know exactly how I feel. Leo is a sweet and fun guy, but dating him clearly comes with baggage that goes far deeper than his problematic friends. He's helplessly trapped and worst of all he accepts it. He literally sits there and takes the abuse. I can't make much sense of him. I mean, I vaguely know about the effects of long term abusive relationships, but not nearly enough to actually do anything. The longer they last, the harder it is to leave. Is he scared of Malia? Does he still love her?

If he loves her then why the fuck is he dating me?

My lips quiver and my eyes sting. Instantly, they close. Not right now. I can't do this right now! Not while in class. Not when he keeps glancing my way. He can't see me like this. Using my hand to shield the side of my face, I stare at the clock. Two more minutes and then I can get the hell out of here and hide in my next class.

A few seconds of eye contact won't kill me. I just need to know that when he looks at me, he's not closed off. I need a sign that he's himself. My attention shifts from the clock to Leo, who is two desks in front of me on my left side. When our eyes lock, a cute closed lip smile spreads on his face. The bell rings. In my peripheral, everyone starts zipping up their backpacks and rushing to turn in their finals. Leo grabs his test and breaks our unspoken conversation by standing up and walking over to the teacher's desk.

Well, I just threw my plan to leave class as fast as possible out the window. Maybe I can talk him out of it. Oh, no. Here I go, again. Pretending I know him. I don't. We may be 'official', but that's a meaningless title. We haven't moved past that first date and we both know it. What does he even see in me? Is it an attraction or is it an escape opportunity?

Let's be honest. I can't tell the difference. The dating thing is still pretty new to me and one would expect things to get easier as it goes along. Leo was doing a great job of easing me into things slowly, but Malia came out of nowhere, literally, and punched these second thoughts straight into me. Hell, maybe I'm the one who is scared of Malia. I may be a djinn, but with no knowledge on how my essence works, I can still get my ass handed to me for a second time. Maybe even a third. Husan isn't in any position to save me. Neither is Leo.

I mean, if I want to continue dating Leo, which I still do for some reason, I'm going to have to resort to old protection tactics. Mickey and Chris would save me from bullies back in elementary and middle school, so I never felt the paranoia of not knowing when the next attack will be. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't feeling that paranoia right now. My body still aches in some places. I'm just good at hiding the pain. That being said, I'm currently giving my bodyguards the silent treatment. It hurts a bit to accept the fact that I still need them to protect me, but it's true. I'm not ready to fight on my own. Not when it's two against one.

I came into class today wanting to avoid Leo, but seeing him look so happy to see me has changed my mind. We most definitely need to talk.

I grab my backpack, stand up, and make my way towards Leo who is standing by the door patiently waiting for me. Walking past him, our eyes stay fixed on each other before I break it. I can't hold back my smile when I hear him follow close behind me. Once at my locker, I lean my shoulder against it and watch him approach me.