Ten Rules of Being a Heartbreaker

Rule Ten- The Final Stage

Rule 10- The Final Stage

A.K.A. Having a happy break-up.

It's time. You're ready.

First of all, public or private? Private means no audience, and therefore no awkward stares, but he might get emotional or try his hand at pity sex. He may even get violent. Public means you can leave easily and he'll be less likely to cause a scene but if there is a scene, it won't be pretty. It's your choice.

Secondly to avoid a scene, be nice. Compliment him and insult yourself. If you're out to get the full heartbreaker experience, sneak in a few sly insults disguised as compliments. No-one likes a total bitch but if you're breaking hearts as a way of revenge, I guess being a bitch is the way to go.

In the end, play to your strengths. Each target and heartbreaker is different and really, these rules are more guidelines and rules or guidelines are made to be broken.

He catches me at lunch. There's people but not that many. It's the perfect break up time.

"Hazel, have you thought about it?" Jason asks while playing the puppy dog card as best as he can. His big brown eyes gaze at mine sorrowfully.

"I did," I bite my lip. "I really considered it." Actually, I didn't, because you know, Jason, we really should just be friends because I'm quite sure I wouldn't go out with you ever again even if you paid me with all kinds of fantastical clothes and a trip to Narnia.

"And? Are we still boyfriend and girlfriend? Were we even dating?" He inquires. "I have to know."

"Jason, I really like you," I say as his face lights up slightly, "as a friend. I just don't think we're going anywhere!" Mostly because I'm lazy and I really want to stay here. I believe they call this state "sexy free and single, and ready to mingle". But I don't call it that. That's a lame name. Hey, that rhymed!

"Really?" He demands. "I thought we were. I thought you loved me too!"

Wow, angry Jason.

"I just think that we're such different people and we're not well suited," I sigh. Yup, not well suited. If I were a pair of high heels, you would probably be Crocs. "Please don't take it personally."

Don't take it personally? I really wasn't pulling out my best lines.

"How can't I take it personally?" He yells. "You're breaking up with me!"

I wince. Now the entire student population has heard.

"What did I do wrong?" Jason continues but now he's quieter and sadder. "Was it something I've said? Can I do anything so we can work it out?"

I shut my eyes at the line I'm about to spout out. Really Jason, did you have to bring me to this?

"It's not you, it's me," I hear myself say. "I just can't do it anymore. You're sure to find someone else though!" Oh great. This is the worst break up you've ever done Hazel. *slow clap*. I salute you sir. Well done. Well done.

"Really?" Jason asks, puffing his chest out slightly.

"Oh, definitely," I nod my head vigorously. "I think you'll find someone much, much, much better than me. Maybe even today!" Ha. I don't think you'll get over me that quickly.

"You know," he says thoughtfully, "I have always liked your friend Helena." Oh Hazel, you're getting back on track. This break up is remarkably smoo-

Wait.

WHAT.

"She's pretty hot," he goes on, "and I might have asked her out if it wasn't for Hugh and well, you. Do you think she likes me as well? Should I ask her out?"

"Go for it," I choke out. My God, she wouldn't touch you with a ten foot pole! Right? Right? RIGHT?

"To tell the truth," he muses, "I think she's prettier than you and much more youthful and innocent. You look quite old. She's thinner as well."

Oh no. Oh no. Oh no he didn't!

"Thank you Hazel," Jason grins. "I think dating you was very... informative. Now, I'm going to ask Helena out, if Hugh doesn't cut my balls off."

As he walks off, I whip out my phone and dial furiously. Damndamndamndamn.

"Hugh? We have a huge problem."

The End

That was the VERY LAST chapter of Ten Rules of Being a Heartbreaker (unless you want an epilogue, but most people don't. okay)! I'm kind of tearing up over here- this is the first book I've fully finished and wow. Okay. Thank you for sticking with this book until the very end- it spanned over 2012- 2013 (but the uploads lasted less than a month), despite the weird upload times, the short chapter and my constant crazy author's nottes! Ugh, if I get this emotional over a short story, how will I live through a story that I've been planing/ writing/ uploading for months?

And now, it seems I must finally pose the questions-

Do you want an epilogue? and

Which story do you want to read first? "The Girls Next Door" or "You Had Me At Goodbye"?

Answer please, and end my emotional turmoil.

Also, The Mermaid Hunter will definitely be up in February and the description will soon be up on our profile so check it out :) (and yes, I wrote that of my own accord).

But until, then, thank you once again!