My Dark Scientist

14 | Hell here

"My Grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. "
~ 2, Corinthians 12 : 9

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"I see you when you're down
And depressed, just a mess
..I see you when you run from the light
Within your eyes
I see you when you think I don't notice, all those scars"

~MISSIO, I see you

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E L L O R A

THE two volumes of Nuclear Physics was not easy at all. Half of it went right over my head and trying to keep the rest half of it was as easy as trying to keep water in cupped hands.

Moreover, science changes everyday. And this book seems to not have changed a single word since the 1800s or something.
Although I don't know much of Nuclear Physics, even I can make out these theories and methods looks way older than today. I am pretty sure, nuclear scientists today use methods much, much advance than what is written here.

Nevertheless, I do as I am told just like always and study my ass of the whole night.

Like a zombie, next day, with bags under my eyes I attend my classes with a cup of coffee each time for support. Thank heavens Professor Langdon's classes are on three days in my schedule, and today is not one of those days. With the amount of brain that man possesses, he would have understood my problem with just a single glance.

I barely have lunch in cafeteria. I don't remember when was the last time I had sat in a cafeteria table with a group of people who I call friends.
Okay, the friends part NEVER.

Basically I have always been the loner. The weird loner.

Today should be no exception as well. My stomache is full with all the caffeine I had fed it since morning. So I don't bother with food when the bell rings for lunch. Exiting my class, I throw the long ago finished cup of latte in a trash can and stroll my way on the grounds towards my usual spot.

Its a huge tree at the farthest corner of the football field, partially hidden behind the stands. Moonsville has a single huge ass campus for school, college and university. And since I've never been to anywhere out of this town, that spot has always been my own. Since middle school. No one cares for the space behind the stands, people are usually more interested in the stands and the football field.

I have named the tree.
Nat.
Don't ask why.

I sit on the grass, lean against Nat and open the second book on Nuclear Physics for the hundreth time since yesterday. Why am I even surprised I still don't know half of the book yet...

I turn the yellowish, fragile, infinity times turned over, worn out first page as delicately as I can. And just like everytime since I've opened it, my eyes falls on the name written in black ink in cursive writing right above the title of the book. I have read this name every single time I've turned the first page, which is literally everytime I've opened the book.

Magnus Black.

It read. Whoever this Magnus Black person is, I need to thank him a thousand times over and more. There are small notes and meanings of words, words which I can't even pronounce, jotted down in the same cursive writing in almost every page. And the credit for whatever little I have managed to understand and learn from here definately goes to Mr. Black. I would have probably spend all my day searching through google if it hadn't been for him.

There is a slight breeze today which feels so good. Not even fifteen minutes pass, and I already find myself having to strain my eyes to keep them open. I have barely been able to manage one hour of sleep last night...so this was bound to happen.