>>> reasons to live <<<

eight

bruce is so stunned that thor answered that he doesn't respond immediately. thor grumbles something incoherent before bruce blurts his name out, "thor!" "this is he?" his voice his groggy and bruce feels bad for calling him so late. "thor, i-it's me. bruce. please, i n-need help," bruce stutters weakly. "bruce, oh my gods. what's wrong, where are you?" he gives thor his address and thor tells him that he's on his way. bruce tries to stand up again and barely succeeds this time. he shakily walks to the living room to grab his school bag and goes to sit outside and wait for thor. his mother would be mad at him for not telling her where he would be, but its better than her discovering his condition.

not even five minutes later, thor's truck pulls up on the curb. bruce stands up and tries to seems as balanced as possible as he slips into thor's passenger seat. he hugs his backpack as they drive to thor's house. he doesn't talk and thor doesn't try to talk to him. they arrive at thor's house and thor goes to get out before bruce grabs thor's shirt. his eyes are much wilder than usual and thor turns back to him. bruce's grip on thor's shirt doesn't loosen and they are close. close enough that thor thinks about kissing bruce.

"what about your parents?" bruce asks, still holding onto thor's shirt. "they could sleep through a tornado, i promise," thor tries to lighten the mood, but bruce is still tense. he lets go of thor's shirt and slides out of the truck. they carefully make their way into the house and upstairs without incident and thor invites bruce to sit on his bed. bruce chooses to sit in thor's desk chair instead and they sit in silence for what seems like hours before thor sighs, "so, what's wrong, bruce? i'm not dumb, i can tell when something is wrong and i know that was your house i picked you up from. why 3am? why were you so on edge this morning at school? why me?" bruce tries to focus on thor's question, but its hard for him. thor notices his tears before bruce does. "bruce, why are you crying?" he didn't know he had tears left. "i-i don't kn-know, thor," bruce gasps and thor hands him some tissues.

"you can talk to me, you know?" something about his soft eyes and gentle tone made bruce feel safe. "i-i almost h-had him back," bruce blurts out, "m-my best fr-friend, i almost had him back. h-he was in my gr-grasp and i f-fucked it up, as usual." bruce is crying harder now and tries to dry his tears as quickly as they come. "do you mean tony?" thor asks, handing bruce more tissues. "yes," bruce whimpers, "i really miss him." "why don't you tell him that?" thor suggests. bruce knows he's trying to be helpful, but doesn't get it. "i'm sorry, but you don't get it, thor," bruce is harsh again and, again, he knows that he hurt thor. "thor, i'm sorry. i didn't mean it like that. i-i just don't know how to explain it to you," bruce apologizes and thor nods. "let's just go to bed. i'll sleep on the couch and you can sleep here. you can wear this," thor grabs something and hands it to bruce, then he's out of the room before bruce can protest. bruce unfolds the shirt that thor handed to him. it's a football shirt from their school. bruce carefully removes his work uniform and places it in his backpack. then the puts thor's clothes on and lays down in his bed. surrounded by thor's scent and after the events of the day, bruce had no problem drifting off to sleep.

he woke up to his alarm going off as usual and was confused by his surroundings. he thinks back on the night before and it all comes flooding back to him, him being sick, his fight with tony, yelling at thor, leaving work, the food, and, finally, ending up here, at thor's. he stands up carefully and feels a little better than yesterday, but still dizzy. he looks down at thor's clothes that he wore to bed and realizes how big they are on him. the pants fall further with every step and bruce finds a hair tie on thor's nightstand that he secures them with. he picks up his backpack and decides to try and find the bathroom so he can change and freshen up. he quietly creeps around the house and is surprised when he hears whistling in the kitchen. he peeks around the corner and sighs in relief when he realizes it is thor. he is cooking something and whistling happily to a song that bruce doesn't know. thor turns around and see's bruce in the doorway. "banner!" thor exclaims, "good morning. i've decided to make you breakfast this morning. hope you aren't allergic to eggs." thor winks and bruce laughs nervously. "thanks, thor, that's really nice of you," bruce smiles. he doesn't want to hurt thor's feelings so he eats the food that he cooked for him. "this is so good, thor, thanks so much," bruce smiles at thor before hopping off the stool. "i'm going to go change for school now," bruce says, gesturing to where thor told him the bathroom was. "oh, bruce, you can keep the shirt," thor says and it takes everything in bruce not to blush.

bruce goes to the bathroom and thinks really hard about purging, but he doesn't want a repeat of everything with tony. he looks like a huge mess and, of course, he is a huge mess. he looks away from the mirror and pulls yesterday's school clothes out of his bag. he decides to wear his jeans and thor's shirt to school because he didn't want anyone to talk about him wearing the same outfit two days in a row. he puts everything else back in his bag and walks back to thor's room, where thor has just got done changing.

bruce sits down on the bed next to thor and they sit in silence until thor clears his throat, "i can drive us to school in my truck." "oh, no, you've alre-" bruce begins but is cut off by thor laughing, "just let me take you to school, banner." bruce gets caught up in the moment. thor's laugh, his smile, his pink lips that look so soff, the kindness in his voice. before he can think about it, bruce closes the gap between him and thor on the bed. he puts his hand on thor's thigh and leans in. he kisses thor and thor doesn't kiss back. bruce jumps back and begains profusely apologizing, "tho-thor, i'm so... i'm so sorry, o-oh no." "please, bruce-" thor is cut off because bruce is already leaving. he leaves the room and then the house.

then he runs.