The Angel In The Sun

Some nights

I need to apologise for several things. 1) Taking forever to update, 2) the short chapters and 3)This chapter, (not giving away spoilers) Enjoy (if you can)

Also trigger warnings for mentions of panic attacks (Panic attacks effect people differently. This is my experience of it, so don't come at me.) I'm not sure how to put it, but just in case I am putting up a warning. Read at your own risk.

Nico asked me out. I mean, it didn't mean that we are dating but still. At dinner, I asked him the details for this party, and he mentioned Annabeth talked with him too before leaving.

"Wasn't much," he muttered, swallowing a mouth full of lasagna? "she told me to look out for myself and the camp and blah blah. And..., I don't remember what else, but why are u asking.

 Did she say something to you?""No," I replied a little too quickly and now Nico was glaring at me, "um she did say bye, but that's it."He stabbed his fork into his meal, and stared blankly into the night, his dark eyes reflecting the light from the camp light.

 Nico was looking at the crack, I realised, near the Poseidon table. Everyone had figured he was the reason it was there, but I never asked him for details.

There was so much about him I didn't know. So much I wanted to, things I wanted only him to tell me. His past, who he was. The protectiveness I felt over him extended to every little thing about him. (Is that dam sentence even grammatically correct)

I felt Nico's mood shifting as he grabbed the fork tightly, his knuckles white. This is what I hated most about being around him. The pain he held on, carried it on like he wanted to and knowing I could do nothing, is the worst part of it. I would carry his burden without question if it were possible. Take it on, even if it kills me and free him of everything he ever felt.

 But I know Nico would never let me do something like that? How much he kept telling me he was getting better, I knew he would never let himself feel happiness like that.

Mentally, I can still tell he is in a place he can't get out of.I put my hand around Nico's shoulder, whispering in his ear, "hey. it is alright. Breathe. I'm here,"

He loosens under my touch, his chest expanding and contracting. The forks clatter out of his hand, and his breath starts hitching. "Nico," I pull him into an embrace, "are you there?"Kayla, who is sitting beside me, raises her eyebrows in question at Nico, who is trembling with his face buried in my shirt. 

I shake my head, dismissing her and turning back to Nico. "It's alright. Nico?" I knew as a healer I was definitely not the person who was supposed to be panicked, but I couldn't help it. "Do you want to go back to your cabin? 

If you 're not comfortable being around everyone here."Nico didn't even care to, not before I felt the shadows surround us, pulling me deeper into the cold. Nico shadow travels us to his cabin and slips from my arms falling to the floor, clutching his stomach."Hey, Nico. please just talk to me. Are you there? I'm gonna have to put you in the infirmary otherwise." I kneel down and pull him towards me, prepared to murder anyone who tries to take him from me.

Nico nods, panting, "I'm-I'm fine. Will. You should go."I shook my head. "I'm not going anywhere. Not until you let me know what happened di Angelo,"Nico was sweating, hugging his knees to his chest. I saw a tear roll down his cheek and I feel I might end up crying, too. 

This isn't fair. I want to scream to all the gods up there of Olympus, probably sitting up there in their loafers and drinking nectar from a wineglass.