Yet Another leo valdez Memories Fan Fic

loving, living, and losing my way.

(A/N, so... I have the perfect example of ADD in action. last night I went to bed and look at the time, it was around 10:30 p.m. and I couldn't sleep and just thought about random things, for what feels like five minutes... I look at the time again and it's nearly 2 a.m! and I know I didn't fall asleep cuz I watched the lighting storm! anyway, have a wonderful day or night.)

he's shown in the house again, in his room, but this time he's packing a back pack, his movements slow as he tries not to agitate his bruised and battered body. both Mr. and Mrs. Mathews just left for work so right now would be the perfect time to run.

He finishes stuffing two outfits into the bag along with food, medkit, and a few photos of Maya. he refuses to forget her, and forgive himself or Mr. Mathews, she would be alive if he'd just left with her to begin with and didn't waste time trying to talk to Mr. Mathews who he knew wouldn't tell him a damn thing.

how stupid was he? clenching his teeth, in anger at himself or the searing pain pulsing through his body he isn't sure. slinging the bag over his shoulder he walks out of his room, stopping to look into Maya's, the walls glowing pink with the light streaming in her window.

he could almost feel her holding his hand, tugging it as she begs him to look over her blueprints and grade them for her or asking him to make tacos. he whispers "I miss you, I'm sorry I didn't do more... I could've done more." he looks down, Maya isn't there, he's alone, he feels his heart braking all over again. he just want's his family back.

but that's the one thing he'll never have. a family that loves him. shutting the pink door he walks through the house and out the back door. fighting the feeling of emptiness. running through the back gate he takes the suburban streets onto the highway. he isn't sure where he's going, or why he's going, but anywhere is better then that house.

glancing back at the house he could almost see Maya playing in the back yard. he's tempted to go back, just to be sure she's truly gone, that he's not leaving her behind. but he felt her die in his arms, he felt her heart stop. he whispers "goodbye, baby doll. tell Mamma I said to remember to eat." forcing tears back he continues on down the highway.

Rayna was not expecting to be blinking away tears, or to be feeling a tad bit bad about her first impression of Leo and how wrong it was. justified but still wrong. if she had known about this before she would have forced him into counseling.

looking over at him his head hangs low, his curly hair hiding his eyes he's slumping down in the chair, or as well as one can when chained in said chair. she looks over at Jason, his expression's pained, she knows this look, it's the one he gets when he tries to find where he messed up.

she has to fight a smile at the thought, she knows it's wrong that she's happy because he's sad but the thought that he may be in pain because of other people's choices makes her feel like she isn't the only one.

(A/N, ok... I'm sorry I haven't made a chapter in a few days... I have no good excuses, Beltane was day before yesterday, and allergies have been kicking my ass. that and I have been trying to figure out what I want in life, cuz I want to go into psychology, and go to collage but I need to study for my GED and then get a masters to be able to practice psychology... that's eight years of my life, gone to something that may not work out... ok I'm done hope you all will comment and all that jazz, if your actually reading this then thanks for listening)