Away We Go • 2 • Formula One

Chapter 59

schedule who? this is my second upload in a week omfg who am i?

this chapter needed to be split into two bc it was getting too long. don't worry, there's no cliffhanger this time 😅

as always, vote and comment throughout!

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"What did you do?"

From the tips of my toes to the top of my head, my body was trembling. I was scared for the answer to my question because I knew it was more than likely going to hurt me. Whatever it is, Max must consider it to be bad or else he wouldn't be in the state that he is in. My utmost trust in him has never felt so misplaced until this moment. Looking at his guilty face as the tears started to fall was a reminder that he isn't innocent - something has happened, and I will be reluctant to do any sort of forgiving until he tells me. A small, naïve part of me was clinging on to the hopes that there was nothing wrong.

Max ran his tongue over his lips. By now, I had pushed my way past him into the bedroom on the off chance of catching a woman hiding in the wardrobe. The bed sheets were barely creased from when I had made the bed this morning, but that didn't mean anything because Max could've easily fixed it if he had indeed had someone else over. My eyes scanned over the floor for any other indication that my doubts were true, however nothing was standing out.

"You've got to trust me," he begged, crouching down in front of me from my spot on the edge of the bed. This time, I didn't pull away when he reached out for my hand, but I didn't make any effort to grip his back.

I scoffed. "How do you expect me to do that when you're clearly hiding something? I won't ask again - what did you do? You better answer, Verstappen, or I'm walking out that door."

Max let out a heavy exhale and looked down at the ground. He stayed in that position for a few seconds, unmoving, as tears spilled out from his eyes and onto the exposed skin of his thighs. I started to get impatient and made a move to stand up, however he pushed me back down onto the mattress. "Don't leave!"

"Then talk," I sternly told him.

"I-" Max looked at me desperately as he struggled to form his words, "I want to tell you, but I can't. I don't..." he trailed off as sobs shook through his body. I hated how my heart felt tight seeing him this way when he was the one hurting me. This feeling turned into guilt as I watched him struggle to catch his breath as he tried to get a further explanation out. His chest was rising and falling exceptionally fast and he let go of my hand to clutch onto the shirt material around his neck and try to pull it away. "I can't breathe."

No matter how I was feeling right now towards Max, I still cared enough to help him. He had helped me through countless panic attacks before and this seems like the tables have turned. Seeing him in this state made me recall the time he had a breakdown in bed after telling Vic about the miscarriage, and how he tried to hide it from me.

I watched as he tore the fabric away from his skin, the sound making my toes curl. That's one way to take your shirt off. "Max?" I carefully asked, reaching out a hand to place on his shoulders. I used my thumb to gently push his jaw in my direction, forcing him to look at me. "Baby, I'm going to need you to match my breathing, okay?" I started to take long, deep inhales through my nose, holding for a few seconds, before exhaling. It seemed for a bit that he was able to keep it under control, however his eyes frantically began to look around the room and I knew the panic was still setting in. "Please just try and focus on me. I'm right here."