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-June 15th 1996-

   I am now 5 weeks pregnant. I have started to crave foods and no one knows about my pregnancy still.I hide my vitamins when I have visitors. Yesterday I was asked to babysit a coworkers son so she could go out with her husband on a date. The baby is 3 months old and his name is Flynn. There is a knock at my door and I open it to see Sandra,Danny and their son.

Bri:Hello.You may come on in.

They enter my apartment.

Sandra:Your living room is beautiful

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Sandra:Your living room is beautiful.

Bri:Thank you. I'll be buying new furniture soon because I'm gonna move.When I do you can have it if you want. It suits your house better than mine.

Sandra:You really like to spoil people.

Bri:Yeah I do.

Danny:Well we will take you up on your offer. We moved 3 months ago and still have no furniture in our living room.

Sandra:We have been to buisy tending to Flynnie.

Bri:Understandable. Babies need a lot of attention.

Danny:Thank you again for doing this.

   Danny puts down a portable basnet in my living room and puts the baby bag next to it.

Bri:It's my pleasure. I enjoy taking care of babies.

Sandra:I think you'll make a wonderful mother some day.

Bri:"Smiles".I hope so.

Danny:Okay honey its time to hand over Flynn.

   Sandra begins to hand the baby to me and kisses his forehead not handing him over.

Danny:Honey we gotta get going. We will see him in a few hours.

Sandra:It's just so hard. He's 3 months old what if he needs me?.

Danny:We fully stocked the baby bag. He will be fine. He's in good hands.

Sandra hands the baby to me.

Bri:My sister was the same way. I couldn't hold my niece till she was 3 months old because Janice was paranoid. I know it's tough but it's better to start to learn to let go earlier on.

Sandra:Yeah you're right...Call us if he needs us. He likes to listen to the Flinstones and-

Danny:Honey she knows there is a list in the baby bag and i told her on the phone.

Sandra:"Sighs".Bye Flynnie."Kisses his forehead".Mommy will be back soon.

   Sandra and Danny soon leave and I told their son and he begins to cry.

Bri:Sh don't cry Flynn."Sings".I can't fight this feeling any longer.And yet I'm still afraid to let it flow.What started out as friendship has grown stronger.I only wish I had the strength to let it show.I tell myself that I can't hold out forever.I say there is no reason for my fear.Cause I feel so secure when we're together.You give my life direction,you make everything so clear.

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