(UNDER EDITING) The One Whose Adopted | Friends Fanfiction

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-December 27th 1994-

At Central Perk Phoebe is getting ready to sing and Joey is not here

Phoebe: So you guys I'm doing all new material tonight. I have twelve new songs about my mother's suicide and one about a snowman.

Chandler: Might wanna open with the snowman.

Joey finally enters the Cafe.

All: Hey Joey.Hey buddy.

Monica: So how'd it go?.

Joey: Ah I didn't get the job.

Ross: How could you not get it?. You were Santa last year.

Joey: I dunno. Some fat guy's sleeping with the store manager. He's not even jolly it's all political.

Bri: So what are you gonna be?.

Joey: Ah I'm gonna be one of his helpers. It's just such a slap in the face y'know?.

Rachel: Hey do you guys know what you're doing for New Year's?.

Everyone But Me and Rachel protest and hit her with cushions.

Rachel: Gee what?!, What is wrong with New Year's?.

Chandler: Nothing for you,you have Paolo. You don't have to face the horrible pressures of this holiday desperate scramble to find anything with lips just so you can have someone to kiss when the ball drops. Man I'm talking loud.

Rachel: Well for your information Paolo is gonna be in Rome this New Year so I'll be just as pathetic as the rest of you.

Phoebe: Yeah you wish.

Bri: New Year's isn't about kissing someone at midnight...Infact I haven't kissed someone on news years at midnight since I was 22.

Chandler: It's just that I'm sick of being a victim of this Dick Clark holiday. I say this year no dates we make a pact. Just the 7 of us dinner.

All: Yeah okay. Alright.

Chandler: Y'know I was hoping for a little more enthusiasm.

All: Woo!. Yeah!.

Rachel: Phoebe you're on.

Phoebe: Oh, oh good.

Rachel: "Into microphone". Okay hi. Ladies and gentlemen back by popular demand Miss Phoebe Buffay. Wooh!.

Phoebe: "Takes mic". Thanks hi. Um I wanna start with a song that means a lot to me this time of year. "Shakes bell, Sings". I made a man with eyes of coal. And a smile so bewitching. How was I supposed to know. That my mom was dead in the kitchen?. "Shakes bell". La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la la, la, la, la, la.

As time passes and Phoebe is still singing everyone is sad.

Phoebe: "Sings". My mother's ashes, Even her eyelashes, Are resting in a little yellow jar, And sometimes when it's breezy...

Over the sound of Phoebe singing we hear two men having a noisy discussion.

Phoebe: "Sings". I feel a little sneezy, And now I. "Stops singing". Excuse me, excuse me!. Yeah noisy boys.

They stop talking and look up.

Phoebe: Is it something that you would like to share with the entire group?.

???: No. No that's, that's okay.

Phoebe: Well c'mon if it's important enough to discuss while I'm playing then I assume it's important enough for everyone else to hear.