Hiraeth

ᴄʀᴀᴠᴇ

I blew out the smoke that filled my mouth. Looking around my huge living room, now filled with smoke. I bring the cigarette again back to my lips. Groaning when I hear my home phone ringing.

"Mr Jensen," the old man from the front desk greets when I answer the phone. "There's someone here to see you." I furrow my eyebrows curiously as from what I know no one was coming over.

"Who is it?" I mutter leaning back into the black leather couch.

"They won't say." It goes silent for a moment deciding if I should waste my time on them or not. "Mr Jensen?" He snaps me out of my thoughts.

"Yeah," I trail off. Still debating. "Let them in." I confirm. If they came this way might as well see what they want.

I hesitantly put out my cigarette crushing it into the ash tray. Patiently waiting for my visitor to come in. I stare at the bright light waiting to here the elevator door open. Hearing the door open my eyes instantly narrowing when I see Joseph entering my home. I quickly shot up from my seat.

"No need for that son." He put his hands out mockingly.

"Do not call me that." I grunt. Glaring harshly at him.

"What a lovely home you have gotten for yourself," he stalks around me like I'm his prey. "A little far away from home. Don't you think?" He taunts.

"You know what Joseph." I sign sitting back down on my leather seat. "I've chosen not to associate with you and Mia anymore." I take my phone that was on the table beside me. "And I hope you would do the same." Now giving my phone my undivided attention.

"Well Caden." He sits on the couch across from me. Great now I have to clean the whole couch. "I was quit surprised when I noticed all your stuff was packt." Well now he notices as I've been gone for almost four weeks. "I didn't think you had the courage to leave." He leans back into the couch like he own the world. "You were always a little bitch." He spits.

"Leave." I mutter. He signs in delight spreading out his arms on the couch. "Leave." I snapped. "Or so help me I will make you." I glare. He puts his hands up mockingly.

I storm up to him grabbing him by the collar of his expensive black suit. I throw him on the floor kicking him in the jaw. Joseph smirks wiping blood off his mouth. I kneel down punching him straight in the gut. His smirk instantly vanishing and a smirk growing on my face. I lift up his head roughly shoving it back down on the cold floor. I harshly grabbed his wrist leading him to the elevator. Soon as the door opens. I throw him inside, his head hitting the elevator walls hardly. Joseph slides down the wall clutching his stomach painfully.

"Have fun with your concussion asshole." I said to him while the elevator doors start to close. Dumb bitch got blood on my floors. I walk up to my room leaving the mess behind me as the cleaners will be here in an hour.

I walk into my bathroom a first aid kit in my hand. I quickly treat the cuts on my hand ignoring the stinging pain when I rub alcohol on it. I look up at the mirror noticing my glossy eyes. I kicked his ass while been high as fuck. That's always a fucking win.

How did he even know where I lived? That's some stalker kind of shit. I walked out of the bathroom opening the balcony door, fixing my gaze on the mess on the glass table. Paper, books, computer, and pencils spread out. Having to study for a big test coming up.

I find it quit relaxing when I study as I always smoke a cigar. It relieves the tension from my head as I easily get headaches. Remembering one time I showed up to finals, high out of my mind and one of my junior teachers confronting me about my appearance.

I sit down staring at the busy streets of Long Beach, California. Hearing the ocean waves from a distance even though I don't live near the beach unlike other residents of this city. I'm more of a city person as I love hearing the chaotic mess that comes with it. Everyone with different lives and different things going in there lives that no one has no clue about since were all just stranger living in the same area.

I look down at the view as I live on the highest floor. I see some people with wide smiles on there face, some with frowns, one even on the verge of tears. Cars beeping at the one in front of the other, friends having conversation with each other. We all just have our own complex crazy lives.

I see the side walk I found Heaven at last week. Matt and Scott said the reason why she left for over a month was because she went on a vacation with her father. Maybe it's true maybe it isn't but she seems different and I know her brother passed away and of course she's going to change slightly from that experience.

I did notice the slightly faded bruises that covered some parts of her body. She seems more out of it. I can't help but feel slightly concerned about her well being. Feeling a little annoyed that she's not like her usual self.

Seeming more quiet and kept to herself. There's nothing wrong with drinking but there's no need to get drunk. I pursue my lips when I feel hypocritical, having memories of my fifteen year old self getting black out drunk, craving the buzz I felt that would go through my ears. It never really seemed to go away either. I still crave the feeling yet replace it with just a cigarette knowing I won't stop if it happened again.

I bite my lips harshly that I can feel the blood seeping through my lips. Tasting my own blood. Attempting to pause my thought of the nights I would stumble around a trashy alley way. I close my eye trying to control my raging breathing. Feeling the euphoric feeling that went through my fifteen year olds mind every time I got wasted, I would dream of running through fields of flowers, huge carnivals filled with any candy that I ever wanted, swimming calmly in the middle of the deep ocean birds cheering from above me.

I felt so alive when I would gaze off fantasying about the exciting life I would have ever time I would have way to many drinks.