Why Are You My Remedy? [Book 1]

6

It's been two weeks.

Two weeks of the same routine with Luka. Luka is adapting to the system. He never complains but he keeps asking entirely too many questions.

He's nice to me.

"What are you writing?"

I slowly look up at his strong figure. He's smiling, as usual. I don't know how he smiles despite the situation we're in. All I know is that I don't want him to end up like me.

Empty.

"Hey," He wraps a blanket around my body. "You okay?"

I try to smile, "Thank you for the blanket."

He sits down next to me and leans against the wall. His shoulders are so close. Too close. Never close enough. His body heat does more than this blanket ever will. My body is silently begging him for something I can't allow.

Touch me, please.

He's watching me write in this journal.

"Are you writing a book?"

"No."

"You should, you've been writing in that journal ever since I got here. Probably even before that."

I turn and face him. I shouldn't have done that, we're less than 3 inches apart. I can't look away. I don't know how.

It's just something about his eyes.

I've been lying to myself. Trying to deny the impossible.

I know him. I know him. I know him.

The boy who does not remember me I used to know.

"They're going to destroy the French language. Every language actually, everyone will soon speak one language." He says softly. "They want to re-create everything. They want to destroy anything they think that could have been the reason for our dying society."

"No.."

"I know, right?"

"No..."

"It's a good thing you're writing things down. Someday what you're doing will be illegal." He smiled to himself.

I look at him in disbelief. "You're not helping!"

"Oh crap! You're right. Uh, it's okay. Things will be fine. I promise." He reaches for my hand, I quickly pull it back.

"Marinette-"

"You can't touch me. You can't." I focus on the floor.

He jumps up. "Why not?"

"You just can't."

"I don't understand. You don't talk to me. You sit in a corner all day and write in your little diary while looking at everything but my face. You have so much to say to a piece of paper but I'm standing right here. Marinette, please-" He tries to grab my arm again and I turn away. "Why won't you at least look at me? It's not like I'm going to hurt you."

You don't remember me. You don't remember that we went to the same school for 7 years.

You don't remember me.

"You don't know me." I say blandly. "We've shared this cell for two weeks and you think you know me? It doesn't work like that. You don't know anything about me. Maybe I am insane."

"You're not. You know you aren't."

"Then maybe it's you. Maybe you are the crazy one. It's gotta be one of us."

"That's not true-"

"Then tell me. Tell me, Luka. What are you doing in an asylum if you don't belong here?"

"I've been asking you the same question since I got here."

"Maybe you ask too many questions."

He sighs and then chuckles, "We're pretty much the only two people who are alive in this place and you want to shut me out, too?"

I take a deep breath and speak slowly and as calmly as possible, "You can talk to me. Just don't touch me." I turn around.

"Maybe I want to touch you."

"Maybe I don't want you to."

"I disgust you that much!?" I can hear the pain in his voice.

"You don't know what you're talking about."

"Why can't you just answer one simple question?" He sighs and turns towards the wall behind him.

I go towards my bed. I close my eyes and try to drift off to sleep but the thoughts in my head are telling me to stay awake.

I know him.

I've tried so hard to stop thinking about him.

I've tried so hard to forget his face.

I've tried so hard to get those blue eyes out of my head. I know it's him, and I know I met him when I was 14.

I could never forget Luka.

But he's already forgotten me...