The School's Pervert | Namjoon x Reader

the letter

Dear y/n,

I'm dead, bitch!

When you get this.. you'll probably still hate me. You know how I can never admit to my faults so I most likely never apologized.

As I write this, it's night time. Earlier today, I went on a date with Mark to a café.
You were there with Namjoon.
Whenever I'm upset or jealous I lash out instead of accepting my feelings.

All I ever wanted to do was apologize to you and Namjoon.. but after what I had done, I was already too far past return so I made things worse.

Seeing you in the café, I thought it was my last chance to apologize. But what did I do? I spilled coffee on you.

When Mark and I got kicked out of the café it was a reality check. I regretted it all in that moment. I watched you as I walked out of the door, hopeful, but you didn't look back. You were trying to endure the pain of the fresh coffee on your shirt.

As of now when I'm writing this, you're the bestest friend I've ever had in my whole life, and that'll probably stand until the day I die.
Even after I purposely kissed Namjoon at Jin's party, you accepted my half-ass apology and stayed with me.

I really did love you as a friend but my envy took over. I was fake to you though I truly cared about you.
Why did you think I tried stopping you from speaking to Namjoon on the first day but still wanted to be your friend? I was still getting over him but knew you were a badass when I first saw you.

Basically.. sorry and thank you. Here are some things to remember.

1. you're sexy.
you were always insecure and looked up to me for confidence when in reality i wanted to look like you. your style is unique and i was jealous that i couldn't pull it off even though i had all the money to buy myself the clothes.

2. know your worth.
girl.. you should've cut me off a long time ago. look where staying friends with me got you.

3. namjoon loves you.
i dated him. i saw him in a relationship where he didn't love someone.
i can see through his actions, words, the way he looks at you.. it is so obvious. he will love you until the day he dies. i can see it in your eyes too.
i'll say this to namjoon too in his letter, but never break up. get married and name a pet after me, or something.

4. not something to remember but surprise!
I'm bipolar.
my super outgoing personality followed by the outbursts of anger? the fun hangouts that ended in me crying in your arms? yeah.

5. if you haven't yet...
rosé, jennie and lisa (especially lisa) think ur super fun and want to be ur friend. talk to them.. i think you'd get along

6. i love you.
sprinkle my ashes somewhere nice or leave something expensive at my grave.... or nothing at all! it's what i deserve tbh aha ha

anyways, stay true to yourself, love yourself and marry namjoon:)

signing off,

jisu xo

p.s you have every right to my shit. go to my house and raid my closet if you want;)