texting » jolinsky

16

|| JG ||

"Sorry, our house isn't very big," Jack says, blowing up an air mattress. "You can sleep on my bed."

"No, it's fine," I say. "I'll sleep on the mattress."

"You sure?" He asks.

I smile. "Yeah, of course."

He nods, "I'm gonna go get some blankets and stuff from the basement, okay?"

I nod. "Okay."

He leaves and I start to look around his room.

Yes, I know. It's weird and creepy and stalkerish, but I really can't help myself.

I smile as I see a picture of him and his mom from when he was little. I keep on looking at the same shelf and see a picture of him and his dog, and the picture looks pretty recent. I see another picture of him and his brother, I believe. They are both at a beach of some sort, knee deep into the water with the biggest smiles on their faces.

I continue to look at the pictures on the shelf, and my eyes stop on one in the corner. It's turned around, so it's facing the wall. I tilt my head to the side a little, picking it up. It's a picture of Jack and another man, I'm guessing his dad. Jack looks around 5, maybe younger. He's on his dad's shoulders, and his chin is resting on his dad's head. Both of them look genuinely happy, with the biggest smiles I've ever seen on their faces. I notice something in the corner of the frame, and see that the glass is cracked.

"Hey, I-"

I turn around to see Jack dropping the stuff with his mouth agape.

"What the hell?! Don't touch my stuff!" He yells. He takes the picture out of my hand and looks at it for a couple of seconds, shakes his head, and slams it face down onto the shelf.

He sits down on the bed, puts his head in his hands, and groans.

I sit next to him. "I-I'm sorry, I was just looking around, and I-"

"It's fine," He mumbles.

"I know how you feel," I say. "It's not easy to lose someone close to you."

He looks up. "No, you don't! You're Jack Gilinsky, the most carefree, popular guy in the school! How could you possibly know how I feel?!"

"I, well, m-my sister passed away a couple months ago," I say. "I was always the closest to her, and um, she was the only one who knew I was gay."

"I, um, sorry," He says, looking down. "I just don't like to think about him. He uh, he had cancer. And it was pretty bad."

I nod. "But, you shouldn't try to forget your dad, you know."

"I-I know, but it just seems like the easiest way to get over it," He says. "Get over him being gone."

"It's just gonna-" I start, but I cut myself off.

He's crying.

He looks up and quickly wipes away his tears. "Uh, sorry."

"No, no, no, you have nothing to be sorry for. You don't have to be sorry for crying."

"I hate it," He says, more tears falling down his face. "I get pushed around at school, and it used to be that when I get home it would be okay. But now, life's a living hell wherever I go. And I can't seem to escape it."

"I never knew," I say. "I did all of that stuff to you, and you were already going through so much."

"It's okay," He says. "It's not a big deal."

"It is. And I hate myself everyday for it," I say.

"Y-You hate yourself? Jack, don't hate yourself," He says. "I'm okay."

"I'm sorry," I say.

He wipes away some tears. "It's okay. You're still a great person and all."

"I love you, Jack," I say, then immediately cover up my mouth with my hands.

Why am I so stupid?

"As a friend," I add.

He rests his head on my shoulder.

I have to bite my lip to keep myself from smiling too much.

"You, uh, you okay?" I say.

He smiles. "Yeah."

I laugh and put my around him, rubbing his shoulder gently.

"You're so cute," I say.

Fuck.

I need to learn how to keep my damn mouth shout.

He laughs, getting out of my arms, much to my disappointment.

He punches me in the arm lightly as his cheeks turn a shade of light pink.
"Shut up."

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this is so bad i cri