Forever

6

Shannon POV:

"wild night last night?" i could tell from her classic hangover outfit

"some things never change" cari replied, we both laughed.

"I'm sorry for the random text, i didn't want us to avoid each other for ever, but i also didn't want to bump into you somewhere random and not be able to talk to you properly. Anyway, how have you been, what's new?" i said as an attempt to break the ice

"i'm glad you texted, if you hadn't i probably would of done. i don't really know where to start really. i've been busy i guess, with tour and everything and new music, it's been a really good few years for me, what about you, what have you been up to?"

"im really happy for you, everything has worked in your favour recently huh. Yeah, its been an interesting ride i guess, i moved to New York soon after we split and then only recently back to LA in a new house, new beginnings i guess" i was hesitant to mention about my dark place, but i didn't have to worry, she beat me to it

"yeah, i heard that you moved away, Alex told me, she also mentioned that you were kind of in a dark place, and cut people off for a while. i'm sorry about that"

We made small talk for the next hour or so whilst eating, it was all natural, i forgot how much i could be myself around her.

"I've also heard good things about Amelia" Cari blurted out, i didn't think we would cover that topic

"i could sense how much that pained you to say." i laughed.

"yeah, she's really great, we really get along, how about you? anyone else in your life?"

"no, no, i mean there have been people, but no, i've been doing what i said i would, focusing on myself and taking the time to myself."

"you know, i told myselfi would wait for you, to be honest, i was waiting for you for almost three years, but it put me in a really dark place, as you know, and Amelia really helped me get out of that place, but she's not you cari. No one can compete with that, no matter how much they try or how good they are to me"

Fuck, why did i say that, was she going to think i was still in love with her? was i still in love with her?

Cari POV:

No one can compete with me? what is that supposed to mean, i didn't pick up on anything she just said, i tried not to read into it

"does she know you're with me right now?" i guess that could give me more information on how she felt. 

"Yeah, i told her, she was fine about it"

"fuck, you're making it really hard for me to hate her right now"

We both laughed and continued to talk. I had gotten a rug out of my car as the sun had fully set a few hours ago, and it was now cold.

"oh, i see you still wear your Bee necklace?" i don't know why i said that, i could of not mentioned it. I gave her that necklace for out anniversary, i got a matching one, but i don't wear it anymore.

"yeah, i never took it off, i guess i like it, it's a sort of comfort blanket to me, both physically and sentimentally." 

shannon kind of looked down, like she was embarrassed, and gripped the necklace tight

"it's weird, i have never thought about it before, i'm sorry, i should of taken it off." she immediately said after

"no, no, i'ts fine, i mean, it's a nice necklace, even without all the sentimental value, i think it's nice, you weren't just ShanBee to me, you know"

Sitting on this bench, with Shannon, brought back so many memories. we used to sit here for hours, sometimes all night, just talking. This is also my personal spot, i would come here when i was mad, upset, or even happy, just to wright, pretty much all of my songs started here, and pretty much all of them were inspired by Shannon.

Before we knew it, it was about 5am, and it was starting to become light again.

"fuck, its 5:05, i said id go back to Amelia's, she's probably wondering where i got to. I should probably go, this has been nice Cari, i'm glad i got to see you."

"yeah, you should probably get going, it was nice to see you too, and i'm glad you're happy, Shannon" 

It pained me so much to say that, as much as i'm glad she's happy, i wish she was happy with me.