As The World Caves In

fourteen

R I V E R

I wasn't a big fan of parties really but they were occasionally fun and a good opportunity to just let go.

We arrived at the venue half an hour ago and i haven't seen any of my family the whole time.
I knew my mum, Gracie and Oliver were here, all of us boys grew up together so i knew Nathan would invited them.

"Where's your family?" Lilian raised her voice over the music.

"I don't know" I replied. It wasn't false, i had no idea where they were and that kind of disappointed me that they did show up.

"River!" A voice called and i turned behind me seeing my mum and my sister.

"Hi guys" I smiled as i hugged them both tightly "I didn't think you were coming, was slightly disappointed"

"Why wouldn't we come silly" Mum said and i shook my head.

"You guys know Lilian right?" I said as i turned my body more towards Lilian so she didn't feel left out of the conversation.

"Hi Lilian, nice to see you again" Mum smiled and i didn't know if it was sincere or not, i hadn't spoken to mum about Lilian since she first came into the flower shop.

"You too" Lilian smiled and the conversation continued for a few minutes before Gracie dragged her away and me and Lilian began our own conversation.

I felt a presence behind me and i turned around to be greeted with Oliver with a smirk on his face.

"Oliver" I smiled as i pulled him into a hug. We had a weird relationship but sometimes we could get along beautifully.

After a little conversation Oliver disappeared somewhere outside to definitely get high with some of his old friends that he knows through Nathan.

** play song **

"I like this song" Lilian smiled as the song started playing over the speakers "Dance with me" She held her hand out to me.

I took her hand and she guided me past all the dancing bodies to the dance floor.

I didn't dance at all. But something about Lilian made me wanna slow dance until my last breathe and i was okay with that.

Knowing Lilian for as little as i'd know her and knowing how much i think about her crazy.

She had captured me the first time i met her, i couldn't get enough of her and what we did together.

I've said it so many times but she makes me feel so alive. More alive then i've ever felt.

I feel such a burning desire when i see her and it hurts that she feels she can't open up to me.

'will you still love me when i'm no longer young and beautiful, will you still love me when i've got nothing but my aching soul'

'i know you will, i know you will'

She was my best friend, i didn't know much about her and i put that down to her and the fact she was more closed off than i liked but i can't change that.

I wish she'd trust me and open up more than she does to me, the only view of her feelings i had of when we fell into the water

She had her head on my chest, one hand holding mine and the other on my shoulder blade.

She was so beautiful and i'd wish i told her more, she deserved to be told every second of the day because that's how she should feel.

Even on her worse days she should feel beautiful, because she is.

'will you still love me when i'm no longer young and beautiful'

"Who's grave did you visit the second time we met?

'will you still love me when i've got nothing but my aching soul'

Her head lifted off of my chest and she stared into my eyes

'i know you will'

"What?" She asked me.

'i know you will'

"Who's grave was that"

'i know that you will'

I could see her heartbreak through her eyes and that's not even humanly possible. She let her hands drop and she slowly backed away from me before turning and running through the sweaty bodies on the dance floor.

'will you still love me when i'm no longer beautiful'

"Lilian!" I yelled over the booming music

'dear lord when i get to heaven please let me bring my man'

"Lilian!" I tried again but she was gone.

'when he comes tell me that you'll let him in'

"Fuck!" I yelled and got Nathan's attention from beside me.

'father tell me if you can'

"What's going on?"

'all that grace, all that body'

"She's fucking gone man"

'all that face makes me wanna party'

"Who, River?"

'he's my sun, he makes me shine like diamonds'

"Lilian"

' and will you still love me when i'm no longer young and beautiful? will you still love me when i got nothing but my aching soul?
i know you will, i know you will, i know that you will, will you still love me when i'm no longer beautiful, will you still love me when i'm no longer beautiful, will you still love me when i'm not young and beautiful'