"I wanted to remind him of the night we cleared things out. He has all the right to fear especially that we're deviating from the norm.
But what is really considered normal? Men before us were in this kind of relationship already. The Romans knew ab...
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I lay down in my bed basking in the silence of the day. I could hear the world outside going on even without me. Ceaselessly moving on its own phase. Oblivious of my own internal battle. Of the slow death I am feeling inside. I felt broken and empty. A husk. I don't even know if I could continue any longer.
So, this is how it feels to be without a heart and soul. I already gave everything I have before Hia left. Everything that I thought that would let me go on. Everything that I could hold on to. I have let it all go.
Another blow came into my chest. I'm tired of hurting already. My tears had even run dry. Maybe it's true what they say; sooner or later, when all the tears had run out, I would cry out with my own blood. I guess that would be good enough. Good enough for me to atone for my sins. For my momentary infidelity. My moment of weakness.
I kept my eyes shut even though I heard a lone soul came into my room. They tried to keep their silence but the ringing of things shifting inside the room was evident and it's something I couldn't ignore. Na Ploy had brought food again that is seldom touched. I might have lost my senses as well for everything tasted bland. It was the water that only tasted the same.
I continued to listen and came in the same sigh of pity. Is this how I am perceived? Pitiful. How much more could I bear? I just wanted to rest. I needed to heal. I have the whole Christmas Vacation anyway.
When I arrived, my parents were happy but it was immediately replaced with remorse. They knew something was wrong but they chose to respect my silence when their questions remained unanswered.
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Maae seemed to be on the verge of breaking down more than me. I knew she and Pho were having problems and I was only adding fuel to the pyre. But I tried to stay out of it as much as I could. I was too wrapped in my own little planet that I was oblivious of their own struggles. I didn't want a part of it and I intend to separate myself from them. They are already adults and they can deal on their own.
