Black Magic (Kellic)

16

"You called them? " Vic asked. He was in a hospital bed. They had to watch him because he'd lost a lot of blood. He had little memory of what had happened to get him into this state, but I think that he knew that I was the one that had hurt him in the first place.

"I am so sorry, " I looked at him hands, which I was wringing. "I.... " I bit my lip. I felt badly, sure, but I don't know if this is really going to change anything. Vic probably is going to hate me for the rest of my life. And why shouldn't he? I did almost kill him. 

"You aren't yourself," He concluded. 

"I wasn't myself. And.....if I'd known what I was doing, I wouldn't have done it, I swear." I touched the cold IV wire that was connected to him. "I don't know what to say."

"Kellin," he reached for my hand, and I held it out a little further so that he could touch it. He tapped his fingers against mine, "you were speaking to me a few days ago. You were going to ask me something, and then Andy interrupted you. I sort of did too when I assumed what you were going to say. What were you going to say?"

"I was going to ask you to prom," I whispered it so quietly that I was sure that he couldn't hear me even if he really, really wanted to.

"Oh, I wasn't going to that."

"Is it because of Andy?" I winced as I asked the question. Guess who hadn't come to visit Vic? Even if they broke up, that's still a cold move.

"I wasn't going even then. Andy only asked me to make a show of it. I asked him to do that for me, and I'm sorry if it confused you."

"Why wouldn't you go to prom? You're mostly likely to win prom king, and everyone's expecting to see you there. You're the most popular, sought-after person in school. If anyone shouldn't go to prom, it should be the satanic dick that rejected even one of his own friends."

Vic's eyes flicked up to meet mine for the first time since the conversation started. "You think that you have it hard just because people don't like you?" He pulled his hand away from mine. "This is advice, not criticism. People only like the parts of you that you let them see. The reason why they like me and not you is because I'm closed off about everything. How many people do you actually know that know anything about me from before I came to this new school? I'm just another person that happens to be able to sing. They don't like me, they just like a version of me that they've made up. And if I didn't make that version of me up, then I'd be in the same position as you."

"What did happen to you before you came here?" It was something that I'd always wondered, but never really had the opportunity to learn. I guess that's more of a fault on my part than his though.

"I had a very different life." He looked up. "It was nothing like this one here. I had one good friend...." A sad look flickered over his eyes in that moment. "And it was pretty much my him and I against the world. But that day....that tragic day....."

I understood, but I needed to hear him say it. It wasn't the sociopath in me that wanted to hear it, but rather the denial. For someone to die before even making it to high school? I mean, I'm sure that it happens every day, but it's still sad to hear.

"That day.....I wasn't paying attention......and.....his bike just....." He made a gesture with his arm that motioned a bike going off of a cliff. "And I never got say goodbye. I never got to go to the hospital. The funeral......I was taken away from it. They told me that I was making a scene. I was twelve, and I'd just lost my best, my only friend."

I thought about what Andy had said a while ago. He'd said that prom day was hard for Vic. He must've meant that it was the day that this friend died. "What was his name?" I whispered. I felt have honored to hear this secret, and half terrified by the weight of it. Was I going to be the new rock? The next Andy?

"Jaime. Jaime Preciado. That was his name." A bittersweet smile flickered across his face. "And what a name it was. Everyone would always read it wrong." I heard him sniff, and saw that his eyes were turning glassy. "But I loved that it was different."

I put my hand back over his and rubbed it a bit. "I'm sorry."

"What am I going to do? I just lost my only friend again."

"What? Andy's-"

"No! He's not dead! He's not dead. He just....doesn't want to see, talk to, or hear from me anymore. I understand it though. I guess that he was only really in it for the relationship and not for the friendship too."

"I'd be there for both." I didn't want to sound cocky, but I wanted to console him somehow.

"Thanks, but I think that I just really only need a friend right now."

I tried to hide my disappointment. Is it selfish that I didn't want to just be friends? Now, or ever? And so I spoke my thoughts aloud, though the situation didn't call for it at all. "I didn't mean it like that. I could never look at you that way, and I think that.....having a friendship like that.....it's meant to fall apart. It'd be unstable."

"You couldn't suppress your feelings?"

"I've been suppressing my feelings for almost the entire school year."

He pulled his hand away from mine. "So you just wanted to play hero to win the heart of the person that you ripped it out from in the first place? You hurt me, and you hurt Andy too. Don't even get me started on Kev, you hurt him too. And poor Remington, you hurt him when you lied to him."

"How do you know all of that?"

"You told me. When you were in that trace, you told me all of that. You told me that you did it all with one purpose in mind."

"What purpose was that?"

"Serving the only thing that's ever mattered to you: black magic."

A steak right through my heart.