I am so selfish.
I am so selfish enough to pretend that my lover’s sister isn’t in a hospital bed so I can worry heavily on the fact that someone I love is dead and these tears won’t ever stop.
“You loved Wesley a lot,” Annie says. I can feel her concerned eyes on me.
She must’ve heard my screams during the night.
She must’ve heard my agonizing screams and gasps and unstoppable wheezing and Holbrook’s hushed voices as he saw me completely break into two and I wonder if he ever thought that someone just as broken and me could fall apart even more.
Who knows? Maybe I’m falling together this time.
Falling apart.
Falling together.
All I know is that I am falling.
“I loved him so much, Annie,” I say back, breathlessly. I glance at her slightly. She looks like hell but she looks like she’ll survive it.
She’s a fighter.
But that means nothing.
Some fighters survive and some die and you can try as hard as you want but sometimes you won’t ever win and that is just how the world works.
I don’t understand how the world works.
“I tried to stop him, you know,” Annie said, tears pooling in her eyes. “ Tried to stop him from killing himself. He weeped about you when he was trying to kill me. He couldn’t kill me because he loved you too much. I don’t think he has ever not killed someone he wanted to. I know he wanted to kill Holbrook but he knew how much that would hurt you. I think he thought it would be better if he settled for me instead. So he could hurt Gabe. But he couldn’t do it. I think it just became too much for him so he shot me in the leg and then he turned knife into himself.
I don’t know Wesley the way you did. He wasn’t the best person, but he was worth something, Alice. He was a kind of beautiful illustration of a person.”
My eyes are blurring ten times over.
I’ll never let you hurt him. At least not anymore. I will always stand by him and I will be the family he deserves. I will make myself worthy of him.
I had said those words to Ezra about Wesley.
I nodded again and again, unable to see.
There was a hole in my heart.
I should’ve been there.
You can’t protect someone who is dead. I can’t make myself worthy of someone who is dead.
YOU ARE READING
THE B TEAM // Pretty Little Liars #WATTYS2014 #FANFICTION
Fanfiction"I’ve had many things stolen from me. Money, keys, credit cards, even my own heart, but none of that mattered more than stealing lies. People relied on the truth, but telling the truth to the wrong person at the wrong time results in nothing but ago...
Part 1: Chapter 100: The Beautiful Boy
Start from the beginning
