Lost Memories

Chapter 15: Performance on New Year's Eve

Over the trip back Clyde had managed to convinced me to tell Remus the truth. We expected a rage when he found out. Once we reached my condo, I immediately walked over to Remus and sat down beside him saying, "I have to talk to you."

As we did that, Clyde went to get himself a beer from the fridge before sitting across from us. Remus looked at the two of us before he questioned, "You're not hurt, are you?"

"No, I'm fine. It's just that ... Remus, I've been lying to you for a while now. You know how I told you I was going to the Ministry to try to settle ends and win custody over Harry? That wasn't completely true," I explained softly, playing with my fingers nervously.

Remus nodded slowly, the disappointment evident on his face. However, he didn't yell at me. Calmly he asked, "Well, then what have you been doing?"

"I've been working for Cornelius on the side," I replied.

"Doing what?" He strained, getting slightly impatient at my reluctance to tell him the story.

I took a deep breath and confessed, "Remember how I helped imprison those Death Eaters? That made the Ministry trust me and offered me, as compensation, whatever I wanted, except for custody over Harry. I chose a job attending to Azkaban. At first the were reluctant but after some convincing they allowed me to go there around 3 times a month for the past 11 years."

His lips pursed as Remus got angrier by the second. But still, he remained quiet as he asked, "Who was the friend?"

"Remus -"

"Who was the friend?" He repeated, his voice raising ever slightly. "Though, I wouldn't call them a friend if they put you in that kind of danger. I mean, they allowed you to be with Sirius and Death Eaters, who want to kill you!!"

I nervously looked at Clyde who nodded reassuringly. I felt a rush of guilt. I really didn't want him to get in trouble for this but Remus wanted to know the name. So I admitted, "It was Clyde."

Remus glared at Clyde with murder in his eyes. He immediately stood up and tried to calm our friend down, "Look Remus, I understand that you're mad. Trust me, after what I saw today I hate myself for letting her go there but if you just hear me out -"

"Hear you out? HEAR YOU OUT? How can your reason be good enough to let her go there? HOW BLOODY STUPID CAN YOU BE?" Remus roared. He pointed his wand at Clyde. "Stupefy!"

Clyde managed to cast a shield charm but because he wasn't ready, the attack did send him flying back into the wall. The beer bottle smashes into pieces, flying everywhere. Horrified, I screamed, "Remus!"

I dashed over to Clyde's side and helped him sit up. He sat up, rubbing his head as he grunted, "It's alright, doll face. I deserved that."

"What else is there?" He questioned, subduing his temper with me.

I helped Clyde sit back onto the couch before calmly stating, "I would tell you more but you are obviously too upset to listen. I get it. We can talk later."

Remus tossed his wand in front of me as he commanded, "Talk."

I sighed knowing that there was no getting out of this one. I walked to him as I said, "I have been handling matters with the prisoners and such, visiting to see if the conditions met the very few requirements, but mainly? I used my visits to help Sirius."

"Why would you help him? He sold Lily and James to Voldemort before killing Peter!" Remus fought. I winced at that statement. My god did I want to tell him the truth but Sirius had requested me not too. He wanted to be the one to tell Remus but there was no way I could get Remus into Azkaban.