Brains & Bobby

Day Fourteen

I couldn't sleep. It wasn't because of Noah... though he was now in stereo in my ear. No, I couldn't sleep because on the opposite side of the room was Bobby and Marisol. He wasn't starfished out or cuddled up. He looked like he was curled up in a ball, while I was snuggled and safe in Noah's arms. This internal conflict ate at me all night. I felt warm and safe with Noah, but something wasn't right. Things weren't resolved with Bobby. I was no longer mad about the Priya thing, but I was still mad about the lying and the brushing my feelings under the rug. But Noah accepted my faults and understood my heart was in two. It was so... different. Last night he kept kissing me and holding me, making sure this moment was real. I won't deny that I loved every minute of it, but there was a nagging part of me that felt like this was wrong.

My phone pinged which was followed by a few more pings. I looked and we were going on a girls-only trip... for an indefinite amount of time... what?! I just got with Noah and wanted to explore my feelings and I needed to resolve my issues with Bobby. I slowly slid out my bed and met with the girls in the dressing room. Everyone was excited but this made me nervous. Whatever the producers had planned, I wasn't sure it was going to be good.

"Come on Krystal, this is exciting!" Marisol said, her cheeks in a wide grin. I threw on my leopard print bikini, I had been holding out on wearing this, but something told me I needed to be on point. The girls were still getting ready when I was done. I looked down in my suitcase. Bobby's T-shirt was on top. I picked up my journal and tore out a page.

Dear Bobby,

I don't know when I'll be back, but when I do we need to talk. I need you to know that I'm pissed at you. I'm pissed you continue to lie to me. I'm pissed you avoid the big questions. I'm pissed that you just let me go without fighting for me last night. You know how I feel about that! You showed to me you'd be happy to see me with someone else. Does that mean you'd rather be with someone else? Can't you see how that makes me feel?! I'm terrified of falling in love and now we have to be separated even more.

I just hope that this break away helps you figure out what you want.

-Krystal

I snuck out to the bedroom, tiptoed to Bobby's bed, and placed the letter there. His face looked like he was having a nightmare. I bit my lip and turned to go but stopped and kissed his forehead. He instantly relaxed. I hated that he was scared. I stopped to see Noah before I took off for downstairs. I kissed his lips softly. He woke up and asked what was wrong. I explained everything. He kissed me again.

"Don't forget me," he said, running his hand through my hair. I softly moaned. I found myself in the kitchen looking at the uneaten cupcakes from last night. Both Bobby's and Noah's were there where I left them. Why couldn't I let Bobby go? Why couldn't I let Noah take over my heart? Ten minutes later the girls were in the living room, ready to go.

Lottie pulled me into the Jeep and slammed the door when she saw Bobby and Noah. "No! You need to forget them today. It's a girl's day." She said. She was right... I needed a 'me' day.

—-

Bobby looked over that letter. He had never seen her writing before. Her handwriting was so clean and neat. Every word flowed into another. Every word pierced his heart. The moment he saw her walk into the Jeep it was definitive. She was gone. He sat alone with Noah. He was looking longingly at the door. It reminded him of himself. Noah had feelings for her, real ones.

The lads came down and began questioning where the girls were. Noah explained everything. Bobby realized what happened... they were going to Casa Amor... there would be six other blokes trying to be with her!

"Fuckin Walloper!" He bellowed. The lads all looked at him. "Now I have to worry about her with six arses instead of Noah!"

"Hey mate! She..."