Snivellus' sister

51 ~ Harry James Potter

"James! Sirius! Anyone! My waters just broke!" Lily screamed from her living room in Godric's Hollow on the morning of July 31st 1980. Two boys came running in, Sirius looked confident having a baby's car seat in his hand, a hospital bag across his shoulder and a belt containing five bottles of milk. James was the complete opposite, his face was red and panicked. His shirt was half buttoned up and his glasses were askew. "Sirius, what do I do?" James said panicking as he began pacing around Lily who was breathing heavily on the floor. "For starters, help her up and well Floo Powder to the hospital." James nodded and did as he was told with Sirius not long behind.

Sirius sat outside the room awaiting for the arrival of the baby. He'd tried to sat by Lilys side and be there for the birth but Lily told him to "Get the hell out." How rude, Sirius thought to himself as he tapped his foot, checking that they had everything for the baby. Remus and Peter came running up the corridor, with the first smile since Ivy and Silvers deaths on Remus' face. "Is it here yet?" He asked excitedly trying to peer through the window. Sirius shook his head, still searching through the bag. He stood up and placed it on the chair. "Where is this stupid baby bib?" Sirius growled angrily as he pulled out various supplies. Peter furrowed his eyebrows and tilted his head at him. Sirius threw down the stuff and grabbed at his hair in frustration. "I'm going to go home and quickly grab one can you wait here?" He said already turning to leave.

"Padfoot, we don't need it yet." Remus called Sirius turned around and nodded. "We do, the baby's got to have one. What if it needs one? Then when we don't have it, what are we going to do?" He said, his words fumbling into one long sentence. Remus shook his head and sat the boy down. "This isn't about a baby bib is it?" His voice was calming and steady, Sirius shook his head as the tears he had only recently been able to control returned to his eyes and began spilling onto his cheeks. "This should be her, Silver should be giving birth to our baby girl. I know its selfish but I...I can't stop. Every time I think about Lily and James coming out with their baby, I think about the baby I lost. I can't do it, Remus. I can't look at them so happy and pretend like I am. I'm miserable without her." He whimpered, placing his head in his hands.

"That doesn't make you selfish, it makes you human, Sirius. It's understandable, I know you miss her. I miss her and Ivy, I lost two of the most important girls in my life in the space of a few months. I know you're hurting but you just gotta let it out." Sirius nodded and stood up from his seat, he silently pointed to the door leading outside and the two nodded. Sirius walked outside to see no one else around, he wandered over to the wall and pressed his head against it, closing his eyes.

"Silver, if you can hear me, I miss you. I'm really struggling without you, but I want you to know that I love you and I love our baby. But Princess, it's really tough without you. James and Lily get to have everything. They get everything, but me...I lost everything. Everything!" He screamed the last bit, punching his fist into the brick wall. He could hear and feel his knuckles shattering but that didn't stop him, he did it again and again, over and over. Until finally a nurse came out, "Honey, don't do that. Look at your poor knuckles, come in and we'll sort those out for you alright?" Sirius nodded and wiped away his tears.

The nurse bandaged his knuckles back up and gave him some pain relief to take with him. By the time he'd returned to Lilys hospital room, Remus' face was lit up and an excited look glittered in his eyes and Peter looked rather nervous. "He's here." James said as he opened the door allowing the two to come into the room. Sirius paused for moment, unsure of whether he could handle seeing the baby. Remus nodded and gently guided the man into the room.

The red headed girl looked exhausted, her face was red and sweaty with her fiery hair pulled back into a ponytail out of her face. Her eyes looked bloodshot and tired, in her arms was a little bundle of blankets. She looked up at Remus, Peter and Sirius smiling, "Meet Harry James Potter." Sirius and Remus broke out into smiles looking down at the baby. Tiny fingers curled around her pinky. They watched the newborn peer through brand new eyes at what must be such a strange world after life in the womb. His legs kicked out in a tiny jagged motions, looking for that resistance they are used to, but finding nothing but air.