His silence is his Pride (ON HOLD)

Chapter Twenty Four ♥ "Internal Chaos"

                                              Chapter Twenty Four

                                                 “Internal Chaos”

 

                                           "أنت بيتي و منفاي, أنت أرضي التي دمرتني"

                     “You’re my home and my exile, my land that destroyed me.”

 

 

 

Mahra

 Saturday - 3:28 AM

 

I raised my head, my eyes struggled to adjust with the light that reflected from the street lights into the car. Turning to look outside the window, I saw it was still dark and raining outside. Wasn’t this dreadful night planning to end? Wasn’t the sun planning to shine on us again? I was exhausted and had a long night in which I mourned a lot, I shed many tears and uncountable pieces of me were broken on this very night.

   And the person responsible for all my grief sat safe and sound in front of me. I shifted my gaze unwillingly and saw my husband sitting behind the wheel, lost deeply in—God knows— whose thoughts. I looked at him with a broken gaze, a broken heart, thinking; it was impossible. I would never come back to this man’s world ever again. He gave me a glimpse of life with him and it was a painful glimpse. I wished it’ll end as quickly as it started because it is unbearable, he is unbearable. This man was born emotionless; he seems to be dancing on the funeral of my heart.

Look at him now, driving like a maniac in this downpour, controlling the steering wheel single handedly as he searched for something in his pocket and took out his phone. I watched as he checked for any missed calls and I think he had a few, ignoring them completely he switched it off and then repeated the process with his other phone. None of us had said a word ever since we left, only the sound of raindrops on the car’s surface or a sob escaping my lips were heard every now and then.

I wanted to know how long it had been since we left the hotel. My watch, I think I threw it in my bag and my pride didn’t allow me to ask him. So I sat there nerve wracked for what it seemed like half an hour. When those excruciatingly slow minutes passed, I realized that my house could not possibly be this far from the hotel.

I looked closely at the world outside, because of the wind and rain I couldn’t see much. My confused and stubborn eyes kept searching for a clue to assure me that my doubts are incorrect. But as my restless gaze fell upon a board that read ‘Jabal Ali’ I realized that with this despicable man even the wildest of my dreams can come true.

He tricked me… once again!

I turned left to right, hoping that I am wrong and that he wouldn’t stoop as low and lie to me again, but who was I kidding? He definitely lied to me and God knew where was he taking me now!

 When I finally found my voice, it was shaky and afraid. “Where are we going?” I questioned. Not liking the quivering of my tone, I spoke again, louder and clearer. “Where the hell are you taking me?”

Silence was all I got in reply.

“Stop the car right now, you traitor.” I demanded but he didn’t listen. “Stop the car. Take me home, you promised me.” He seemed to be expecting such a reaction from me sooner or later, therefore he didn’t budge. As far as I was concerned, well I did, there was no button close to me that I hadn’t pressed to get out of the car and away from him, but he had locked all the doors. I tried shouting, yelling, begging and crying but nothing worked. He was unshakable.