Something About Her (completed)

Chapter 33 -Joe

Car dashboard, screaming "Joe! Joe! Joeeeee!", thats all I saw and heard the next second it was pitch black. I felt asleep but I was fully awake, I felt like I was floating, like my whole body weight was being lifted and carried away by something, anything I didnt mind, I was peaceful. I had nothing and yet my life was perfect.

White tiled ceiling,  a bright light, a worried blurry face, a hand, a spark, Blackness again. Nothing made sence to me and for once in my life I felt fine with it. I was at peace, but I knew I couldn't stay I had to fight this feeling no matter how right it felt.

I pushed against the invisable barrier that was keeping me in the black domaine, nothing I felt trapped, unable to cope and inprissioned. This wasn't what I wanted. No I wanted to see colour experience things again. This was not it !

After what felt like hours of struggling, my patience was dying and I was getting frustrated, the blackness was closing in and I felt like the right thing was to curl up and except defeat, but I had to try a couple more times. Suddenly a shock raced though me, I felt warmth and the blackness was tore apart, light raced though the dark to reveal a blurry white image. I looked around to see if I could identify anything, to see if anything was different. To my left there was nothing but blurry whiteness surrounding me however to the right there was a blurry shaking image.

I knew straight away who it was and it warmed me from the inside, I tried to smile but I felt numb. 'oh no' was my first thought had I lost the feeling in my body forever, was it the sediatives or was it something else. Was I in a coma? "Keep calm Joseph, you'll be fine, im sure theres a reasonable explanation". 

Suddenly a small voice echoed in my head, it was soft and heavenly, it calmed me and wrapped me up. Its message however saddened me. "Joseph... I think you can hear me... so im just going to tell you what the doctors have told me ... breathe sophie... Joe... you have a hole in your heart... it means that somethings if you get too stressed .... or upset.... or even worn out when doing physical activities .... you could suffer an attack like today... you almost died Joe..... I thought I lost you..... im sorry im .... crying but ... I thought you... were gone... it was all my fault... I felt ...responsible. .... my heart hurt... from just the thought... of losing you... babe.... I ....love....you... you're my....heart and.... soul...dont ever... leave... ple....."

I couldn't hear her any more, she was gone, my special something had gone, I had lost connection with her, I cried myself sleep that night. I knew she was there and I knew that she felt weak and guilty but i felt something with her, she gave me confidence when i had really given up, it really wasn't her fault it was my own.

The next day was different, when I woke I could feel my whole body, everything in me felt alive, like my energy levels had, had an overdose and they were prepared to fight and get me out of this situation. I opened my eyes and at first my veiw was blurry but then my eyes focused, I looked around from the white bricked hospital bedroom, to the green cotton sheets that were tucked around me. To the table on my left covered in presents, teddys, cards and chocolates. Balloons from fans, friends and family members floated in almost every square inch of the room, 'wishing me good luck in getting better' and hoping that I would 'get better' or 'well soon'.

I smiled as I glanced to my right side, Zoe, my mum and my dad were sat asleep hand in hand on three cusioned chairs. Although it was great to see them together as a family and sleeping in peace I was even happier to see Sophie holding my hand and trying to stay awake. Somehow I knew she would of been awake all night talking to me and checking if I was okay.

I lifted my arm upto her face and stroked her honey hair out of her eyes. "Thanks babe" shes said yawning, her eyes filled with tears, suddenly she looked up and grinned, her eyes twinkled with happiness and her smile lit up the room, she had to pinch herself a couple of times to make sure she was really awake and not in a really deep dream. "Your awake !?!" she yelled waking up Zoe and the rest of my family. Who soon surrounded me with hugs and kisses.

I let them talk for a while and appreciate that I was alive before asking them if they could leave "Guys I know I almost died yesterday but can I speak to Sophie alone please?".