Finding Me (A Joe Sugg / ThatcherJoe Fanfiction)

Chapter Thirty-One

My palms were sweating and I was extremely nervous. None of my friends (including Layla) were allowed to enter the room and I wasn't sure if I was completely okay with that. This was going to be the worst day ever.

"Alright Marilyn, I'm going to tell you what's going to happen, is that alright?" Dr. Lanzetta said getting everything set up. There were a few more doctors than I expected, but at least I know I'm getting a good treatment. I nodded and let him continue.

"So what's going to happen, is that I'm going to put this mold on you that you took last visit and I'm going to ask you to take your top off. Yes I know, it's strange, but you'll have the mold over you and I have to mark on the body where my boundaries are. Now, we are doing an external radiation treatment on you, but we may have to switch to an internal depending in how well this all works. We will continue this same radiation treatment for five to eight weeks, but count more on it being full term... And we will be having these sessions five times a week from Monday to Friday so you have weekend rest. Do you have any questions?"

"Will it hurt?" I asked looking up from picking my nail beds. It was a terrible habit I had, but in this situation I don't think it mattered.

"No, it feels like you're getting an x-Ray. Are you ready?" He asked getting the mold ready. I nodded and I took my shirt off. I am usually self conscious especially around people I didn't know, but I wasn't scared to take my top off. A weight lifted off me when he said it didn't hurt.

There was a table next to me that I was asked to lie on, so I nervously got on the table and lied down. Dr. Lanzetta drew little pinpoint marks around my huge bruise looking mark. I looked down to see that the mark hasn't gotten larger since the last time I paid any attention to it, which was good. Next to me was a big machine that actually had the radiation come out of it. It looked like a big robot with a huge forearm, which was kind of cool. Doctor Lanzetta put this shield by my head and my stomach so that during my radiation none of my important organs would be damaged. I closed my eyes as he set the machine up and I prayed that nothing would go wrong. My breathing deepened and one of the nurses seemed to notice. She put a hand on my forehead and whispered, "you'll be fine. We have ice cream in the lobby." I was definitely going to make it through today's treatment if I get free ice cream afterwards.

"You are all set Marilyn, are you ready?" He asked standing by the door. I nodded and he walked out.

"Alright Marilyn, if you can hear my voice say 'yes'" Dr. Lanzetta said from an intercom.

"Yes," I replied.

"Okay, this machine might be a little loud, but whatever you do... Do not move from your position. If you ever feel uncomfortable or feel like you're going to be sick throughout any part of this please say something and we can lower your dosage. Is that okay?" He said. I didn't move an inch because I was scared of what was going to happen next.

It sounds like a vacuum cleaner and it immediately reminds me of home. My mother died this morning and here I am getting radiation to ensure me that I won't die. My life was a complete mess, not to mention I just dumped my God-like boyfriend and my sister was going to be living in the United States while I try to emancipate her. My breathing steadied as I was now more comfortable with my surroundings and I understood that this was going to help me live.

"You're doing wonderful Marilyn, are you okay?" Dr. Lanzetta said over the intercom.

"Yes," I replied. Was I okay? No, I wasn't okay. My life was terrible. My head was spinning and I had a really weird feeling in my chest now, especially on my left side.

"Alright Marilyn, we are shutting the machine down. Please don't move unless we tell you to," the voice said. The machine whirred next to me and finally it grew quiet. After a few minutes of me laying where I was, Dr. Lanzetta came into the room.