Patience

Chapter 18

I would like to dedicate this chapter to my dear friend @DonnaStyles She is just a wonderful person who is always there for me.

Kate pov

Harry and I are driving to the hospital, I look outside but everything is a blur. After Harry told me about the tumour he held me in his arms until he had to go home. I wanted to ask him to stay, to hold me but I didn't. I want him to stay because he wants to, not because he feels like he has to or that he pities me.

I snap back to the present when I feel Harry's big hand on my knee and tried to hold back a yawn. Harry laughs at the silly face I make.
"Didn't have a good night?" he asks.
"No, I kept thinking about this and what's going to happen," I admit. I look at Harry and wonder if he slept better than I did. He looks tired too there are dark blue bags under his eyes.

When we arrive at the hospital Harry parks in his parking spot before we walk inside. I feel the nerves all over my body. My teeth are clenched. I'm shaking. I feel nauseous and I want to cry. Suddenly I stop and look at Harry. He's such a beautiful person. I don't deserve him.
"Harry I'm scared," I admit with a little voice. Harry takes a step towards me and rubs my arm.
"I know, I'm scared too. I'm here with you. I'm by your side all the way," he takes my hand and pulls me towards the gynaecology department. Suddenly, Harry stops to talk to another doctor. When I look sideways I see a tall, blonde woman glaring at me. I recognized her from the day Harry and I went to the zoo. She said hello to Harry and gave me an angry look. Why would she do that? She doesn't know me. She was very friendly to Harry, maybe they were in a relationship? But doctors and hospital personnel aren't allowed to have a relationship together. The woman gives me another angry look before she walks inside a room. I decide to ask Harry about it later.

When we arrive at the waiting area a small woman, I think she is a nurse or secretary, gestures to Harry that we can go straight into the doctor's office.

We sit down in front of the desk and I look around. This office doesn't look like Harry's. The walls are soft pink. The wall behind the desk is covered with birth announcement cards and the other one has a case against it filled with big books. Behind a little wall there is the examination table.
Harry squeezes my hand, "You'll be okay," he whispers and I shoot him a little smile.
Suddenly a small, skinny, middle aged woman with blonde hair comes in.

"Hi Harry, Miss Jones, nice to meet you," the woman pats Harry's shoulder and shakes my hand.
"I'm Dr. Cass but you can call me Donna," she smiles and walks around her desk. I try to relax my body but I'm so nervous, I'm totally cramped up.

"Kate, I had a look at your scans yesterday, and they told me there probably is a tumour on your left ovary however, we only saw a part of it, so today I want to do a trans-vaginal ultrasound so we can have a proper look at it and then we can set up a plan. Does that sound okay?" I nod while Harry rubs my shoulder.

"For the ultrasound, you're going to underdress your lower half and lay down on the examination table. I know how much pain you're in and I promise to make it as comfortable as I can. Please don't be shy. Make sure that you talk to me and tell me when something is wrong," the doctor smiles. She talks to me like she really cares and takes her time. It gives me more confidence in her.

"I will cover the ultrasound probe with lube and insert it into your vagina about two or three centimetres, that way I can take a look at your uterus and ovaries. It will feel a little uncomfortable but it won't hurt. Are you okay with that?" I smile and nod again.

"Euhm Harry and I... we're not... I mean we are... " I stutter and stumble over my words. Hi probably look like a fool.

"I understand, no problem, we'll get you settled first and cover you up. Then, Harry can join us. Okay?" I thank doctor Donna and she shows me where I can undress.

I undress and the doctor helps me up onto the table and my foot in the roll bars. She also covers me up with a paper towel so Harry can come in without seeing my feminine parts.

"You can come in Harry," the doctor calls and two seconds later he is by my side. He kisses my forehead and takes my hand while the doctor is getting the ultrasound probe ready.

"Okay here we go," she announces before she inserts the probe. Like she said it feels a little uncomfortable but doesn't hurt. Both doctors look at the screen and Donna did some things on the ultrasound panel. It looked like she was measuring something.

"Okay Kate, this here is the tumour," she points it out on the screen. "It's a big one. It's six by eight centimetres and fully wrapped around your uterus. I'm surprised you've never had any complaints, especially around the time of your period."

I knew it was there but I'm still shocked and more scared than before .

"You can get dressed and then we'll talk about what we're going to do."

Harry walks back to the office part while the doctor helps me off of the table, before I dress myself and go back to the office. I sit down next to Harry and look at the doctor who is doing something on her computer.

"Unfortunately the tumour is too big and too wrapped up around your ovary that I can't resect it. I'm really sorry but I will have to remove your ovary completely."

My mouth falls open from utter shock. "Remove," I mumble. The doctor nods and I look into Harry's sad eyes n

"When do you want to do it?" Harry asks carefully.

"It's already quite large and I don't want to let it grow more because it could explode. I'm going on holidays in three weeks but because you know Harry, I will prepare a team for this Friday, early in the morning." Harry and I both nod and thank Donna.

"How does the surgery work? Is it invasive?" I ask but my voice breaks at the end.

"Every surgery has risks but here, the risks are very minimal. We'll do what is called a laparoscopy which means you will be under general anaesthesia. I will make three small incisions into your belly. One in your navel and one on each side of it. I will insert a tube to pump gas through to inflate your tummy. Through the three incisions we can insert a scope so we can remove the tumour. It will take a maximum of two hours and then I want to keep you here overnight. After that I don't want you to be alone for at least a week." Doctor Donna explains everything really well and slowly she gained my trust.

"Can Harry watch the surgery?" I ask hopefully. It would make me feel better.

"I'm sorry, I can't allow someone who has a personal relationship with you inside my OR."

I understand but I don't like it.

"Do you have any questions," the doctor asks, and I shake my head.

"If something comes up don't hesitate to ask Harry or contact me," she says before she stands up and shakes my hand. "I will see you on Friday".

We walk outside of the hospital. Due to the walking before and then the sitting during the appointment I'm limping and it's time to lay down.

I wait in front of the hospital while Harry gets the car. It's a silent drive until Harry blurts something out that I didn't expect, "Come stay with me".

I look at him shocked and wonder if I am dreaming. "What?"

"Let's get to your apartment, pack the stuff you need and then come back to my house. It might sound crazy but I don't want you to be alone. I want you with me," Harry admits.

"I'll be alone when you work and how long do you want me to stay?" It's a crazy proposal but spending more time with Harry sounds very good.

"You should stay until at least a week after your surgery. Please Kate!" He looks at me with his big green puppy eyes