Inside and Out | Seventeen Fanfiction

Fighting

"I'm here Joshua, I'm here" Vernon held Joshua's hand, feeling the older's hands shaking tremendously.

"I thought I lost you"

"Then put on your night vision, like you were supposed to" Vernon giggled.

Joshua felt his cheeks burn with embarrassment as he placed the glasses on his face, finally being able to see Vernon's face.

"It isn't funny!" Joshua sneered. Vernon couldn't help but giggle some more.

A pair of hands grabbed Joshua by the waist and dragged him backwards, making the older automatically point a gun behind him. Making the person dragging him panic.

"Relax, Shua! It's DK"

"Which one?"

"Why would Hanbin's DK drag you backwards?" Seokmin chuckled. "Dumbass"

Joshua continued to blush with rage as he elbowed Seokmin in the ribs, making the younger wince.

————————
Several days since the incident

"Cutting out the lights was a real smart idea, wasn't it Jeonghan?" Joshua pushed him over onto the couch roughly. Cross with the turnout of the last mission.

"Hey! It wasn't my idea! It was Son-"

"I don't care who did it! My boyfriend is back in the medical room because you assholes changed the plan!"

"We wanted to have some fun! Can't we have-"

"You two, that's enough!" Seongcheol silenced the two, noticing that Joshua was turning redder and redder with rage.

Joshua just found out that Jeonghan was in on the "lights out" plan. It did work, thankfully. But since night vision wasn't 100% helpful to their eyesight in the dark, Vernon got into an accident.

No bullets or knives were involved, thankfully.

But a grenade was.

Song threw a grenade in pitch darkness, not realising how close Vernon was to the shot. Vernon wasn't seriously hurt, but the burns on his arm and leg (and a little on his head) needed to be treated. Joshua was furious at the carelessness.

"If my old boss knew how stupid you were during a mission, he'd behead you" Joshua mumbled under his breath. Soft enough for no one to hear.

Vernon told Joshua over and over again that it wasn't that serious. But the bandages wrapped around his body told the older otherwise.

"Well, the plan worked, we captured the criminals and they're locked up. I dunno why Joshua is so mad-"

"I'm angry because your friend was foolish enough to throw a grenade without knowing where he was throwing it! Vernon could've died!"

"Yeah, but he didn't die, luckily for him. And you being angry about it isn't going to change anything!"

"I fucking hope it changes everything! Because of how stupid you act, you put people's lives in danger!" Joshua was screeching now, knuckles were clenched tight and white.

Jeonghan was also red with rage.

Mingyu and Wonwoo pulled both boys apart, before they started ripping each others throats out.

"Since you don't like how I work Joshua, maybe you should leave! Go back to being the assassin you once were, if that's the life you're looking for" Jeonghan sneered. He knew Joshua's weakness was his past, and the only way to really break him down was to use his past against him.

Joshua's eyes darkened.

"Like hell I'm going back there. I'm not the person I was before and you know that!"

"You've haven't changed at all, Hong Jisoo. You enjoy bringing people down and letting them live in your own shadow. You're a monster"

"Jeonghan, that's enou-" Seongcheol started, but Joshua cut him off.

"Stop it! Just shut up!"

"I'm starting to question whether Vernon loves you at all, he probably feels sorry for you more than anything else. You're just empty"

Tears started to well up in Joshua's eyes and his throat begin to tighten.

"Stop it..." he croaked out. Mingyu now loosening his grip on him.

"Go back to he-"

"JEONGHAN THAT IS ENOUGH!" Seongcheol bellowed. Silencing everyone.

Jeonghan looked up at the leader and then immediately looked down with shame. Joshua was crying, hard.

"I need to leave...I'm sorry" Joshua ran up the stairs and slammed the door shut. Locking himself away from everybody.

Everyone glared at Jeonghan, who was still in Wonwoo's grasp. Seongcheol was furious.

"Nobody's perfect, Jeonghan. And I know you both were angry. But you NEVER bring someone down like that, never"

"I'm sorry..."

"Don't apologise to me, apologise to him when he comes out"

Jeonghan nodded shamefully, his own tears were welling up in his eyes.

What have I done?

————————
Vernon became very confused and curious about the noise downstairs, the voices were muffled so he couldn't hear the argument clearly. But he knew one of the voices was Joshua's.

Next thing he heard was a door slam.

He became instantly worried as the house was deadly silent. The fight must've been vicious.
———————
Joshua's POV

Maybe he's right...Vernon just feels sorry for me.

Why would he love someone who brings everyone down? Someone who's just...empty?

I feel stupid for believing he loved me for me.

But at the same time I believe that is true, but who's right and who's wrong?

I could ask Vernon himself but...he could lie.

Everyone lies.

My life has been filled with lies, maybe that's why I don't really know who I am.

And who I'm supposed to be.

But I know one thing...

I love Hansol, I really do.