I Could Have Never Imagined This

Chapter 32

Chapter 32: It's What's Best

~Song Fall by Ed Sheeran~

~JULIA'S POV~

I can't believe this was happening to me. I am so stupid. Why did I even come here? This has been the biggest mistake of my life. I've ruined everything. How am I gonna tell him? I thought. Harry was right I just needed to come right out and say it. The tears started to roll down my face again. I was in Niall's bathroom. I was trying to make it look like I wasn't crying but it was no use at all. The tears just came strolling down. I put my hands to my stomach. There was a baby growing inside there. Even though it was ruining everything at the moment, some part of it made me happy. I knew I had to leave Niall because of it but it's a life. I can't take a life. And this life, this baby is a part of me and Niall. Things may not work out with Niall, but I will always have this little piece of him. And he will always be in my heart. 

I walked out of the bathroom and into his room. There he was sitting on his bed. He was playing his guitar. He noticed me and came rushing towards me in a panic.

"Babe--"

I stopped him. I refused his touch. This was so hard. I stood there sobbing and grasping my stomach.  I walked over to the wall and put my head against the cold wall and I covered my face with my hands and stood there sobbing. After what seemed like an eternity I spoke,

"I don't know how to tell you this any other way. And I know I have to go after I tell you. I just...I'm....I'm so sorry."

"Please what is it?" He cried. 

The worrying building up in his voice. I pressed my lips together as I tried to control my sobs before turning around. I turned around, my head against the wall my eyes facing up.

"I'm pregnant Niall." I said as my right hand went immediately to cover up my mouth as more tears strolled down.

I slid my back down the wall as I sat down with my knees to my chest. Niall stared at me. His eyes filling up, he was trying so hard to fight back the tears.

"Are you.....are you sure?" His voice squeaked.

I nodded my head in reply. He came to me and sat beside me.

"Oh my God." He whispered.

I turned and looked at him,

"Niall, I can't-I can't have an abortion."

"I wouldn't have asked you to even think about that." He replied.

"I know, I have to leave before this gets out of control. I promise I won't let it get to the press. It'll be like I never existed when I'm gone. I'm so sorry." I sobbed.

He was silent.

"Harry knows," He looked at me. "I-I didn't know how to tell you. I asked him for help."

"Julia, I want you to know that this isn't just your fault. You can't blame yourself. It's my fault as much as it is yours. We both made the choice. The baby's mine as it is yours. I don't want you to leave. We can handle the press. I know we can."

"You can. I don't know if I can. I think it's best for everyone if I just go."

"Have you told Sylvie? Do you have any idea what this will do to her if you tell her you have to leave?"

"I don't know how to tell her. I can't ruin everything for her. She's gone through so much. But I...I can't stay here. I'm only 18, I don't know how to handle this. I'm scared and I want to go home before it all gets out of control."

He was silent for a bit then he spoke,

"I get it."

"You do?"

"As much as it hurts, yeah I understand. I just want you to know that whatever happens you're always in my heart Julia. Always. I love you."

"I love you too." 

And I crawled into his arms, huddled up like a child. We stayed like that for what seemed like hours.