Voyage Of The Damned Pt. 1

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Hello everyone! Bread here and I just want to tell you some stuff, firstly I won't have any internet for about a week starting in three days, so there won't be any updates form there on until i get internet back >-< and secondly today is my birthday... I'm old now XD JK, anyway's I hope you have a great day/night X3

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The TARDIS is in flight. Suddenly a fog horn sounds and a ship's bow crashes through the side.

"What? What?" a ship's bell sounds, and {Y/N} picks up life belt that has the name Titanic on it.

"What?" the Doctor returns to the console and adjusts the controls. The TARDIS walls reform, pushing the ship back outside. Then he materialises it inside the ship, next to a board detailing a list of shipping companies. The fog horn is sounding again.

*Time skip*

People in Edwardian dress are enjoying a champagne buffet. A band plays a slow version of Jingle Bells. Around the room are golden skinned statues of male angels. One moves as the Doctor and {Y/N} walk past. Then the Doctor spots a small red-skinned alien in a dinner jacket, and goes to a window.

"Right" the Doctor says.

"Attention all passengers. The Titanic is now in orbit above Sol Three, also known as Earth. Population, Human. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Christmas" the Doctor and {Y/N} look at each other. They walk past a recording of a bald man with a thin moustache sitting behind a desk.

"Max Capricorn Cruise liners. The fastest, the farthest, the best. And I should know because my name is Max" his gold tooth glints in the light. the screen returns to the logo, and the lady singer croons Winter Wonderland. The Doctor has changed into dinner jacket and bow tie, while {Y/N} has a different dress on.

"Merry Christmas, sir, ma'am."

"Merry Christmas" {Y/N} replies. Couples are dancing to the music. The Doctor and {Y/N} mingle, passing a man on his mobile phone, they go up to one of the angels.

"Evening. Passenger fifty-seven. Terrible memory. Remind me. You would be?" the Doctor asks.

"Information. Heavenly Host supplying tourist information."

"Good, so, tell me, because I'm an idiot, where are we from?"

"Information. The Titanic is en route from the planet Sto in the Cassavalian Belt. The purpose of the cruise is to experience primitive cultures."

"Titanic. Who thought of the name?"

"Information. It was chosen as the most famous vessel of the planet Earth."

"Did they tell you why it was famous?" {Y/N} asks.

"Information. All designations are chosen by Mister Max Capricorn, president of Max, Max, Max" the Host twitches and its voice pitch rises. The Steward notices and hurries over.

"Ooo, bit of a glitch" the Doctor says.

"It's all right, sir, we can handle this" two more officers arrive and they switch off the Host before carrying it away.

"Software problem, that's all. Leave it with us. Merry Christmas. That's another one down. What's going on with these things?" {Y/N} looks up at the Doctor shrugging.

"I didn't do it" she says.

*Time skip*

"For Tov's sake, look where you're going. This jacket's a genuine Earth antique."

"I'm sorry, sir."

"You'll be sorry when it comes off your wages, sweetheart. Staffed by idiots. No wonder Max Capricorn's going down the drain" the man leaves the waitress, {Y/N} and the Doctor stop to help her.

"Careful. There we go" {Y/N} says.

"Thank you, ma'am. I can manage."

"I never said you couldn't. I'm {Y/N}, by the way and this is the Doctor."

"Astrid, ma'am. Astrid Peth."

"Nice to meet you, Astrid Peth. Merry Christmas" the Doctor says.

"Merry Christmas, sir, ma'am"

"Just Doctor and {Y/N}, not sir and ma'am."

"You enjoying the cruise?" Astrid asks.

"Er, yeah, I suppose. I don't know" the Doctor says shrugging.

"What about you? Long way from home, Planet Sto" {Y/N} says.

"Doesn't feel that different. I spent three years working at the spaceport diner, travelled all the way here and I'm still waiting on tables" Astrid says.

"No shore leave?"

"We're not allowed. They can't afford the insurance. I just wanted to try it, just once. I used to watch the ships heading out to the stars and I always dreamt of. It sounds daft."

"You dreamt of another sky. New sun, new air, new life. A whole universe teeming with life. Why stand still when there're all that life out there?"

"So, you two travel a lot?"

"All the time. Just for fun. Well, that's the plan. Never quite works" {Y/N} says.

"Must be rich, though."

"Haven't got a penny. Stowaway" the Doctor says.

"Kidding."

"Seriously.'

"No."

"Oh, yeah."

"How did you two get on board?"

"Accident. We've got this, sort of, ship thing. We were just rebuilding her. Left the defences down. Bumped into the Titanic. Here we are. Bit of a party. We thought, why not?" {Y/N} says.

"I should report you."

"Go on then."

"I'll get you two a drink on the house" with that Astrid walks away. Over at another table, a bunch of toffs are laughing at a large woman in a purple cowboy outfit and her equally well-padded companion. The Doctor and {Y/N} join them.

"Just ignore them" the man says.

"Something's tickled them" the Doctor says.

"They told us it was fancy dress. Very funny, I'm sure" the women replies.

"They're just picking on us because we haven't paid. We won our tickets in a competition."

"I had to name the five husbands of Joofie Crystalle in By the Light of the Asteroid. Did you ever watch By the Light of the Asteroid?"

"Is that the one with the twins?" {Y/N} asks.

"That's it. Oh, it's marvellous."

"But we're not good enough for that lot. They think we should be in steerage."

"Well, can't have that, can we?" the Doctor says with his back towards the toffs, the Doctor aims his sonic screwdriver at the champagne bottle in the bucket on their table. The cork pops out, spraying their expensive clothes with alcohol, the Doctor and {Y/N} snicker quietly.

"Did you do that?" the women asks.

"Maybe" the Doctor says.

"We like you."

"We do. I'm Morvin Van Hoff. This is my good woman, Foon.

"Foon. Hello, I'm the Doctor and this is my good woman, {Y/N}" {Y/N} waves.

"Oh, I'm going to need a Doctor, time I've finished with that buffet. Have a buffalo wing. They must be enormous, these buffalo. So many wings."

"Attention please. Shore leave tickets Red Six Seven now activated. Red Six Seven."

"Red Six Seven. That's us. Are you Red Six Seven?"

"Might as well be" {Y/N} says.

"Come on, then. We're going to Earth."

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~Bread 🍞

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