XO

Chapter 25

After scrolling through so many horrifying posts of me displayed on Instagram, I received a text from Roxy. She replied stating that she was out front, and she wanted to talk to me about something important. As confused as I was, I got up from the couch and walked over to my window to see Roxy's car parked in the driveway. It was dark, and her headlights were the only visible thing at the moment. As soon as the door opened, Roxy appears and starts running up to me. "I'm so sorry about everything that's happening to you" she says in the most sympathetic tone that I've ever heard come out of her mouth. I didn't know how to respond, so I hugged her while crying my eyes out. Crying about all of the shit that I received for no fucking reason. Crying that I'm not good enough, and never will be. Crying knowing that there is no one I can trust to go to when I need them. Crying that my family is a fucking joke, and that my mom is a fucking bitch who thinks getting high and hooking up with guys 24/7 solves all her inner problems. Roxy held me tightly against her body, her small pale arms wrapped around my back, while I quietly sobbed for what felt like hours. We stood in the darkness of the night, with her car headlights focused on us like a spotlight, for a long time before she slowly pulled away from me. As she removed her arms from my back, I slowly shifted my vision towards her. And we both just stood there quietly, staring into each other's eyes as if we were looking into each other's soul. Her eyes, were undoubtedly sad, but nonetheless, they were as beautiful as ever. Seeing the pain in her eyes made it even harder to try to hold back any of my tears. As another tear began to roll down my cheek, Roxy wiped it away with her finger, and smiled at me. "You know that you're not alone, right Brooke?", Roxy broke the silence in a serious, yet comforting tone,"You'll always have me."
I stood there silently for a few moments, just taking everything in, before nodding my head. It was in that moment, that I realized I was in fact, not alone. I knew then that I could trust Roxy, because she was my friend even in my worst moments. She didn't like me for my wealth, or my looks, or my popularity; Roxy liked the real me. And even though that girl may not be perfect, Roxy still wants to be friends with her. "Want to come inside?", I asked Roxy as I motioned towards my front door,"It's kinda weird to just be standing outside in the middle of the night." Roxy laughed, locked her car, and followed me inside. We had just began snacking on some chips, when we heard a knock on the door. Roxy and I immediately exchanged confused looks. "Are you expecting someone?", Roxy questioned as she hesitantly looked over towards the door. "No", I replied quickly, before adding,"Maybe the neighbors heard us crying and called the cops?" Roxy stifled a little laugh before saying,"I doubt it." We had began walking towards the front door, when the person knocked on the door a second time. "I'm coming, damn!" I yelled towards the people knocking. As I opened the door, I wanted to slam it right into their faces. Standing right in front of us were the three girls that ruined my life, and had the nerve to show up. After an uncomfortable silence, Britt looked at me with sincere eyes, along with Sal and Angel. "Can we come in?" Right as I was about to turn away, Britt whispered  "please?"
***
"Look, I know why you guys are here." Before Britt could respond to that I continued. "It's to apologize for all the shit you've given to me for no reason at all, right?" As soon as I said what I said, I turned right to Sal. Our eyes met, and she gave me the nastiest look I've ever seen. "Wow, that's what you have to say? After all you've done to us?", Sal retorted with hatred seething in her voice,"Aren't you at least gonna apologize to us?" After all the pain she had caused me over the past weeks, I couldn't believe that Sal wanted an apology from me. They made a public social media account and posted disgusting pictures of me. They told the whole world all of my secrets. I was friends with them, I trusted them, and what did I get in return? Total shit. Everyone hates me now, and I'm a total joke. I know we've always been 'mean girls', but cyberbullying, seriously? They took this all to a whole new level. After standing there quietly for a second, with all these thoughts giving me a headache, I angrily turned towards Sal,"You made the past few weeks of my life a living hell, and yet you expect me to apologize?" Sal immediately opened her mouth to respond, but Angel was quicker. "You had sex with my boyfriend!", Angel cried out with tears building up in her eyes,"He was the first real boyfriend I had! When he chose to be with me, I was surprised. I was surprised he didn't choose another one of my friends that was prettier than me. But of course, in the end, he chose you!" Damn. Angel's words made my heart drop. At the time, hooking up with Jason felt like the right move. But looking back on it, I realized how much damage I've done. "I'm sorry Angel. It's just that Jason was so nice, and I was so hurt and mad..." I began to say as I locked eyes with Angel who was continuously crying,"And, I wasn't thinking... I'm so sorry Angel I was selfish and an asshole, and I understand if you won't forgive me!" Without warning, tears began running down my face. I tried to push them away, but there was no use. I turned my attention towards Britt, who had been pretty quiet, however I knew she had to be just as mad. "Britt... I'm sorry I slept with Ashton. I was mad at you for not telling me about Sal and Cody, but I had no right to hurt you like that!" I blurted out through my relentless tears. "Brooke, you were reckless! I'm sorry for not telling you about Sal and Cody. I know that was wrong, but you didn't have to sleep with Ashton!", Britt responded while she fought the urge to cry. As I looked into her eyes, I could see they were filled with rage and sadness, but also a little bit of sympathy. "Okay so you're sorry about sleeping their boyfriends, but what about what you did to me?", Sal yelled abruptly as she crossed her arms angrily. After I exchanged sad smiles to Angel and Britt, I turned to see an unsatisfied Sal glaring at me with a contorted expression on her face. "What I did to you?", I asked both annoyed and confused,"I didn't do anything to you! I came to you for help because you were my friend. And then you purposely gave me the wrong advice so that I didn't sleep with Cody. And then what did you do? You hooked up with him, my boyfriend, behind my back. And then you made Britt keep it a secret!" It wasn't until after I said all this, that I realized I had been yelling and crying at the same time. "None of that would have happened if you would've just listened to me! I liked Cody from the start! If you would've let me date him, I wouldn't have had to go behind your back to date him!" Sal snapped back with widened eyes. "Well you weren't very clear on the fact that you liked him!", I admitted bluntly but with sincerity,"If I knew you really liked him that much, I wouldn't have gone after him." As I awaited a response from Sal, I studied the look of frustration and uncertainty on her face. "What about all those times you came to me for advice?", she mumbled under her breath. "What about them?", I questioned in confusion. "You would always act like you knew everything because you're so 'perfect'. You used me to make yourself more popular, make yourself seem like you know everything about guys and what to wear and who to avoid. God, I was so fucking tired of you prancing around in front of our friends having them think you were the one behind all of the advice, Sal complained icily before adding,"You're a fake, Brooke." At this point, Brittney, Angel, and Roxy were all quiet and tense, but I could sense that they were curious. I reasoned that Sal probably kept them in the dark with this part.  I took a deep breath and looked Sal in the eyes before saying,"It's true, I'm not perfect. But I didn't come to you for advice so I could look like I was perfect. I came to you, because you are- or were my best friend. And I trusted you." Sal looked down for a moment, then back up with tears in her eyes. "Brooke, I had no idea about all of the things that happened to you, and it shouldn't have come from Roxy. You know that I am here for you, and I am deeply sorry for what I did. What I did was awful and it was out of anger towards you. "I know I should have come to you before about these things, but I never would have wanted you to know about my shitty life", I replied with a sigh and tear filled eyes. "Brooke, everyone has their flaws. We're your friends and we we'll love you even after you make mistakes. I mean, let's be honest, we are all bitches after all", Sal insisted with a little laugh. "Yeah, I agree. And Brooke, I forgive you for sleeping with Jason. Besides, he's just as guilty as you", Angel said as she wiped a tear away from her eye. "So there's no hope for you and Jason?", I asked with a glimmer of hope in my eye, hoping that there was one thing I didn't totally destroy. To my dismay, Angel shook her head no. I was about to whisper something when Angel added,"It's okay though. Now that I know he is the kind of person who would cheat on his girlfriend, I don't want to be with him." I gave Angel a small smile, before awkwardly turning towards Brittney. As we looked into each other's eyes we both began to sob, and we ran towards each other and hugged. "I'm so so sorry!", I insisted as I wrapped my arms around her shoulders. "I know Brooke", Brittney replied in a comforting voice,"And I missed my best friend." I gently and slowly pulled away from Brittney and asked,"So is there any way you could ever forgive me?" Britt looked me in the eyes for a moment before nodding her head, smiling, and pulling me into another tight hug. And with that, Roxy, Angel, Sal, joined in until we were all smashed together into one big group hug. After a moment of pure happiness, we all pulled away from each other and Roxy muttered,"Man, this shit is way too corny for me." I just rolled my eyes, but Brittney said,"Rox, can't you just be grateful for the fact that we forgave each other and we're all friends again?" In response, Roxy flipped her off dramatically, and we all laughed. I wish that that this was all there was to it. But what Brittney said to Roxy had me thinking. Honestly, I hadn't really forgiven Sal for everything she did to me. And that night, when Sal walked out of my front door with Roxy, Britt, and Angel, I realized that I hated her guts. I wasn't ready to push all of this aside. I never really was a person who forgives and forgets, no, I'm the kind of girl who gets revenge. And now, with Sal thinking we were friends again, I was in the perfect position to get my revenge. So, the rest of that night I was satisfied as I sat out on my balcony. With a joint in my hand, and a mischievous smile on my face, I breathed out its smoke while breathing in the last of the summer thrills.

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