Yes. - lost.

Chapter 15.

First letter.

My psychiatrist has told me to write a letter to someone who makes the happiest. I chose you. Well, all of you.

When I'm upset or feeling depressed, I can just open my laptop and watch a couple of your videos.

I just wanted to let you know that you guys have been such a positive impact on my life.

You guys made me smile when I was at my darkest state in life and continue to put a smile on my face.

You guys are what brought me up when I was depressed and I genuinely felt happy.

Thank you guys so much for being there for me even if you don't know me and you probably never will but I'm okay with that because even if I don't know you, you make me smile.

Second letter.

She only allowed if I continued to write these letters so, here I am.

I don't really know how to continue these. I mean, am I supposed to write my feelings down or something? But I'm honestly so excited to go to Digifest.

Third letter.

I feel free. I feel different. Like I can do whatever I wanted.

I finally know what I want to do here. And that is to find myself.

She still loves me the same. Daughter or niece.

Fourth letter.

But yesterday I got to get out of my comfort zone. Be free, be something I never was.

You guys have helped me in a way I can't grasp. My way of thinking has changed.

But here, here I actually pay attention. Here I finally get to observe new things, a new way of life.

They read the last letter. Andrea was teary eyed, Connor's jaw was stuck to the floor, and Sam had his eyebrows furrowed. Kian, holding the letter, clutched to my notebook, starring at the page. Jenn was looking straight at me in disbelief. None of them spoke, leaving the room dead silent for over a half hour. Jc and Trevor still aren't back yet. Ricky had left the room, he wanted to read my letters alone.

"I understand if you guys want to leave." I sigh, finally breaking the silence.

 "Why would we leave?" Sam asked, his eyebrows still furrowed.

"I don't know." I sigh. "Most people don't hang out with me for this long. Except for my aunt, of course."

"We wouldn't stop hanging out with you just because of these letters." Andrea smiled. "In fact, now that I know a bit more about you, I want to hang out with you more than ever!"

"Yeah, you already stole mine, Jc and Trevor's friendships. Not to mention some of the boys were already gawking at you when we at the beach." Jenn laughed.

"Connor." Sam coughed out his name.

"Sam." Connor mimicked him. Earning a laugh from everyone.

"Okay, okay. But what happened?" Ricky asked, turning to a more serious subject. "Why did you have depression?"

"I don't know if I'm ready to tell you that yet." I rub my elbow. "It's kind of a long-"

"I don't see why you had to drag me to the restaurant if we weren't going to get anything anyways." Trevor scolds.

"I just wanted to look at the food. See if anything was good." Jc winked at me.

Before we walked up to my room, I got an extra key card for Jc since the group was going to be split. The woman at the desk gladly gave me one and I gave it to Jc. I told him to keep from now till I leave the hotel since he practically comes here a lot.