Who Will Win My Heart 2

Chapter 87

Louis's hand is intertwined with mine with his rough thumb rubbing over mine. Out the window I watch the snowflakes float to the ground and melt almost instantly. It's past midnight and we have a good ways until we get back to the flat, I'm just happy we will be the only ones there since everyone else rented out a hotel room.

My mind flashes back to Niall holding Miranda up against the wall. She was so scared and he didn't care. He just stood there, I never saw him like that before and I don't want to see him like that again. I feel bad for her, for the way Niall treated her because of the miscarriage but I will never forgive them from before.

Louis pulls my hand up and kisses my thumb, lingering his lips there longer than he usual. I feel my lips move up when I look at him and he smiles back before bringing our hands back down to rest on the console in the middle of our seats.

"That was nice of you to do what you did for Miranda." His voice is careful and guarded.

"I just couldn't let him do that to her, no matter how much I dislike her." I remark, watching his face as he keeps his eyes on the road. He frowns for a moment but the wrinkles in his forehead disappears.

"I don't know what has happened to him." Louis shakes his head.

"Miranda was pregnant." The words tumble out of my mouth and his eyes widen. He turns to look at me for a second then back to the road.

"Was?" He asks, squeezing my hand.

"She had a miscarriage and Niall lost it afterwards. She told me he would get drunk, push her around and blame the miscarriage on her." My voice is unsteadily, forcing myself to look out the window to prevent thoughts seeping into my head.

"Baby what's wrong?" He looks back and forth to me and the road.

"I just keep thinking what if? What if I was still with him and I got pregnant with his child and lost it? How could someone I use to trust turn into a monster? It was already bad enough that I lost Brayden's baby." I feel guilty for admitting my thoughts, but Louis holds my hand tightly.

"Well you aren't with Niall, you are with me. And if that ever happened to you, I would bash his teeth in even if I was with you or not. He is going through a rough time, he isn't a monster." Louis defends him and I just sigh. I use my free hand to cover my face from the lights on the streets, trying to get rid of my headache before we get home.

"I didn't mean he was a monster, he isn't like my father was. He just needs to get his shit together." I huff in frustration and I pull my hand out of his. He turns his head to me, I don't know if it was disappointment or that I hurt his feelings.

He doesn't say anything the rest of the ride home and I'm glad, I need to sort my thoughts out so I don't flip out on him. We have come so far, I need my mind to agree with me for once.

When we get home, Louis helps me out of the car and wraps an arm around my waist to make sure I don't slip on the ice. He follows me up to our bedroom and I flip the light switch on, almost blinding me. Louis quickly flips it off and turns on the small lanp that gives off little light. I sit down on the edge of the bed and he bends down, sliding my heels off of my feet. He stands back up and kicks his shoes off into the closet. I take off his tuxedo jacket and I hang it up as he leaves the room. I slide my dress off over my head, my beanie comes off but I fit it back on where it belongs. I lay back on the pillow in only my bra and panties, the cool sheets send relief through my body. I hear foot steps up the stairs and Louis sucks in a deep breath as he comes to a stop at the doorway. I open my eyes to look at him as his stands motionless while his eyes travel up and down my body once then he makes eye contact with me. He has a mug wrapped in his hand and I can see the steam come off the top. I sit up when his feet shuffle over to the bed. He sits down infront of me and hands me the mug.

"I made you some te-ea." He stutters as he is flustered.

He tries to get his tie off but he fails in frustration and that's when I decided to help him.

"I'll help." I whisper, sitting the mug down on the nightstand beside the bed.

He turns his torso to face me with one leg folded up on the bed and the other hangs over the side. I cross my legs as I scoot close to him. His breath becomes staggered when I gently pull off his tie and he huffs.

"Damn tie." He mumbles and I laugh.

I move my hands to the button up shirt. I start at the top, pulling each individual button through the holes. He closes his eyes when I get to his stomach and I watch his face. When I unbutton the last one, I slide the cloth material down his shoulders, making sure I touch his skin as much as I can. Once he is shirtless, I just stare at his tattooed skin and I realize why I like them now. I trace over his bird tattoo with my index finger and he holds in a breath before leaving it out.

"Why do you like to torture me?" His voice comes out weak.

"I'm not, you can do whatever you want to do to me." I try to be sexy but I fail incredibly at it, making him chuckle lightly.

"You know I can't."

"Kiss me." I whisper to him and he shakes his head.

"If I kiss you I won't be able to stop." His voice is shaky and unsteady.

"Then don't." I tell him as I lean in, brushing my lips against his.

He hesitates for a minute before letting his lips to move in-sync with mine. I push him backwards until his back is against the mattress. I straddle him so each of my knees are placed firmly by his sides. I dip my head down to push my lips against his harder. He grabs onto my hips, squeezing them gently when I grind them against him as if he could break me. I unbuckle his pants and I tug them off, leaving him only in his boxers.

"We shouldn't be doing this." He tells me and I just push my lips against his to shut him up.

He pushes me up for a second and I rest my forehead on his. His breathing has increased and I know he wants this as much as I do.

"Dr. Garcia said it was okay." I lie and he shakes his head.

"Liar." He calls me out and I groan.

"What? Do you want me to call her right now at two in the morning and ask her if it's okay for me to have sex?" I ask and he flips me over so he hovers over top of me, making me laugh.

"No that would be unethical." He laughs along with me.

His blue eyes meet mine and I put my hand into his hair, pushing his messy hair off of his forehead.

"What if I hurt you?" He speaks, scared shitless.

"You won't, I promise. If I hurt I will tell you." I swear and he pulls the beanie off of my head.

"I know you won't." He tells me and I know he is right.

"Please?" I beg him and he just looks down at my face. I hook my one hand around the back of his neck, in attempt to pull his body back down against mine but he resists.

"Leah I don't know, what if I hu-"

"Louis please." I cut him off. He looks down at me with his eyes glossy. I hate seeing him like this.

I sigh and I remove my hand from around his neck I push him off of me, flashing him the fakest smile ever.

"Leah I-"

"It's okay, I understand really." I tell him.

I move myself to the top of the bed and I rest my head on the pillow, burying my face in it. The last thing I need is Louis to see me crying. I let the silent tears out and the bed dips down beside me. His embracive arms slither around me to pull me into his body. He turns me around so my head his resting on his chest. The tears roll down my cheeks on to his chest and he breathes heavily when the wet tears touch his skin.

"Please don't cry baby." He whispers to me, using his thumb to wipe away my tears.

"I hate being sick, I hate fucking cancer." I cry and he pulls me close into his chest.

All of a sudden, he pulls my chin up and connects his lips to mine, rougher than before. I slightly push him off of me.

"Stop. You don't have to, don't have sex with me because you feel bad for me. I don't want our first time like that." I say in a stern voice and he caresses my face with his hand.

"I want to, I want you." He whispers to me, kissing me again.

He wiggles his hand under my back and unclasp my bra. He tosses it across the room, then cups my breast. I tug at his hair as he gropes me, a moan escapes from both of our mouths. I sit up halfway, only far enough up to push his boxers down, leaving him completely exposed on top of me. He pushes me back down, moving his lips to my neck and sucks hard on my skin. His hands move down and pulls my panties down my legs and I kick them off once they get caught around my ankles. His hands are gentle against my skin when he grabs ahold of my hips and I bend my legs up. He situates himself between my legs then stops. He pulls his face up to look at me.

"If I hurt you, you have to tell me or even if your head hurts." He tells me seriously and I nod.

He then dips his head down to kiss me and he enters himself in me. I gasp in pleasure and he stops to look up at me.

"Are you okay?" He asks worriedly and I nod, encouraging him to go on.

He buries his face into my neck with one hand on my hip and the other caresses the back of my head where my hair would be. My one hand holds onto his shoulder and the other threads into his hair while he moves in and out of me.

Making love to him isn't like having sex with someone. The way his fingers touch over my skin is gentle and caring, making sure not to break his small and delicate flower. Each spot where he touches me or kisses me turns into a burning sensation that leaves trails all over my body. The way his body presses down on mine makes my senses go crazy. For the first time in a month, all the pain I go through subsides as it disappears into thin air when we share this special moment together. I never want to be with anyone expect for him.

When we both finish off, he pulls himself out off me and falls over to the pillow beside me. He immediately wraps his arm around me and I rest my head on his chest. Our breaths slow down and we can almost breathe normally. He reaches down and takes my hand, lacing his long fingers through my small ones. He brings them up to lips and gently kisses my thumb before resting our hands on his stomach.

His silence is bothering me, I wish I could read his mind. I lift my chin up to look at him and his eyes meet mine.

"I love you, more than anyone." I whisper to him and he smiles.

"I love you more." He leans down to kiss my nose.

"Did I hurt you?" He comes out and asks. I just stare at him and I shake my head.

"Do you regret it?" He asks another question and I cup his cheek with my palm.

"No I don't. I don't regret a second of it. Do you?" I ask and he looks down with a smile on his face.

"No I don't." He looks up at me. I pull my face up more until my lips are on his again. He kisses me once before resting his head back onto the pillow.

"Do you want to watch a movie with me?" I ask and he sits up only for me to see the crazy look I'm getting.

"It's past three in the morning." He tells me in a high pitched voice.

I pull myself out of his arms and I climb over him, his eyes follow my bare body. My body aches, a lot, but I hold back the pain so Louis doesn't see. I pull my panties up my legs and I put my bra on. I grab his white long sleeve dress up shirt from earlier and I button it from bottom up until four buttons from the top. The shirt comes down to my mid-thighs and is big on me but it's comfortable.

"You know that is see through right?" He says and I don't have to look up at him to see he has a grin on his face.

"I do now, I'm going down to watch tv." I tell him and he groans as I walk towards the door.

"Baby come back to bed." He whines when I walk down the steps.

"Just rest, you need it." I yell to him and I hear him huff from upstairs.

I sit down on the couch and I stretch my legs out. My whole body is aching and I know I will be bruised by morning. Louis won't touch me anymore and I can't hide them from he. He will make sure to look. My head starts to pound again and I mental scold at my tumor like it's an actual person. I flop my legs onto the couch as I turn on the tv. The movie "A Walk To Remember" is on and I select that one. I was always told it was such a great movie but I never watched it before.

Minutes before the movie starts I hear heavy feet coming down the stairs. My eyes flicker over to the body with long plaid sweats on that looks at me for a second but then turns in the opposite direction. I hear him bumping things in the kitchen and he brings me out another mug. He hands it to me and sits down at the edge of my feet. He uncrossed my legs and lays his body between them. He rests his head on my hip while he twines one arm around my waist and drapes the other over my leg. He squirms for a while until he gets comfortable. He mumbles something into my side that I can't quite make out.

"What did you say?" I ask, running my hand over the exposed skin on his back.

"You never answered my question." He mutters and I frown even though he can't see my face.

"What question?"

"Did I hurt you?" His voice becomes more clear.

"No, no you didn't." I tell him and he nods before relaxing again.

I run my hands through his hair and his eyes flutter shut when the movie title comes up at the beginning. A bit later, his body becomes dead weight as he starts to snore. I love the way his lips part when he sleeps. Actually I love everything about him.



I stay up the next two hours, watching this damn movie that just made me cry ever since Jamie told Landon she was dying of cancer. At the end, I find my head putting myself in her shoes and Louis in Landon's, thinking what would happen if I died. What would Louis do? I look down at his innocent sleeping face, imagining him moving on and growing old with another person with a family. If anything ever happens to me, he needs to know to be strong and be able to move on because that is what I would want him to do.

Before I could stop myself, I lay his body down on the couch when I spring to my feet. He flips over onto his right side like he always does and falls quickly back to sleep. I paddle my feet into the other room; I grab a notebook from inside the desk and a pen. I sit down at the desk and I spin the tiny nob to turn on the the lamp. I put the end of the pen on my mouth and I pull off the cap, putting it on the bottom of the pen and the tip of the pen hits the lined paper, staining it with ink.



Louis drives us back to the hospital and I rest my head against the window with my knees pulled into my chest. Things have been off since Louis found the bruises marked all over my body, I hope he won't beat himself up about it.

"Somebody is sleepy." He teases me and I only have enough energy to stick my tongue out at him.

"What time did you end up going to sleep anyways?" He asks me and I sigh.

"Four." I mumble a lie but he doesn't seem to notice. Truthfully I didn't get to sleep until after seven this morning and he woke me up at nine to get ready to go back to hell, aka the hospital.

"You tired me out last night." I grin at him and his lips turn up.

"Yeah yeah, I think it was the other way around."

"I wouldn't take it back though, it was one of the best memories." I honestly admit. He smiles and takes his hand in mine.

"Definitely in the top three." He tells me and I look over at him.

Before I could ask him more, we pull into the hospital and he helps me inside. He carries our bags back into our room and Dr. Garcia walks in.

"I'm going to hook you back up to your IV for more liquids." She tells me and I nod as she slides the needle into my vein at the top of my hand below my middle finger.

"I'll be right back, I just have to grab one more thing out of the car." Louis tells me. He kisses my cheek before walking out of the room.

As soon as he leaves, I snap my head up to look at my doctor.

"I need a favor." I say to her as I dig in Louis's pocket in his navy blue hoodie. She raises her eyebrow at me as I pull an envelope out with Louis's name written on the front, I hand over my letter to her.

"If anything would happen to me, you have to promise you will give this to him." I say in a low voice to her and she nods.

"Promise me." I push when she places it in her pocket.

"I promise." She swears and Louis walks back in with the last bag.

Dr. Garcia then walks out of the room and I scoot over so Louis can climb in. He does just that and he holds me.

"I love you." He whispers and I smile to myself.

"I love you too."
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Hey everyone! I won't be updating this weekend, my family and I are celebrating my birthday so I'm going to be busy, sorry.

Sorry if this was a boring chapter, I didn't mean for it to be!

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