How Can I Ever Get Past This

How Can I Ever Get Past This Chapter 18

Chapter 18

I woke up the next morning with a headache. I went into Josh's bathroom looking for medicine. Yes I was still staying with him. It had only been two nights. I will probably go home tonight. It's just that I felt safe with him, even though at times I felt uncomfortable. I will definitely rather be uncomfortable as long as I was safe.

"What are you looking for?" I heard Josh mumble

"Pain medicine, something for a headache" He reached in a drawer by his bed and pulled out a bottle of Tylenol and shook them. I went and grabbed a water from his mini fridge and then grabbed the pills.

"Thanks" I said as I took the pills

"So what do you plan on doing today?" he asked me.

"Umm I'm probably going to go back to my dorm" I told him.

"Sydney I really don't mind you staying, it's no problem" he informed me.

"You say that, but Josh I'm taking up way to much of your time and space. I should go, you helped out enough, well actually more than enough and I really appreciate it" I told him.

"Sydney the other team doesn't leave until the day after tomorrow. I just want for you to be safe". I just sat there, I couldn't say anything. I mean what could I say? That I would be alright. That wasn't guaranteed. That I could protect myself?  That definitely was false.

"Just stay with me for the day and then I'll walk you to the dorm when you are sure that you aren't going to be leaving out anymore and if you need to go somewhere just call me." He stated. I looked at him.

"Why do you care so much?" He looked as if he was thinking.

"I don't know. I guess I just like you a lot" I smiled.

"Are you hungry?" he asked

"Yea," I replied

"Come on we can go get something to eat"

After Josh and I took a shower; not together separately of course, we went to go get some breakfast. We drove because the restaurant was kind of far away.

We got to the restaurant and sat down and ordered our food. I looked out the window that we were seated by and stared at the scenery. Cars zipped past us on the streets and people walked to their acclaimed destinations. I loved cities like these. I turned my gaze and looked towards Josh who was staring at me. He smiled and blushed when he realized that I had caught him. He was so cute when he blushed. My goal was to make him do it more often.

The waiter approached our table with our food and it smelled delicious.  I heard a bunch of guys began talking and I turned my head to see the whole Tallahassee football team entering. What the hell? Was God out to get me? Was I being punished? What the hell did I do to deserve this? Out of all the restaurants in this town they decide to come to this one. It wasn't even close to campus. I definitely was being punished.

 I tilted my head down and rested my head on my hand while eating trying to cover my face. I did not want Nate to realize that I was here.

"Sydney just ignore them," Josh stated, but I couldn't. I felt him staring at me letting me know that he had recognized my presence. I couldn't force myself to look up. I just couldn't do it!

"Do you want to leave?" Josh asked

"You don't mind?" I replied

"Of course not" he answered

We go to-go boxes and paid for the food. I hurriedly walked out to the parking lot a few paces behind Josh when I felt someone grab my hand pulling me back. I gasped.

"Don't fucking touch her" Josh yelled why slapping Nate's hand away.

"Man you don't know anything, you don't know what happened between us. So I don't know why you are trying to protect her. Little do you know me and Syd had a great time. She wanted to fuck me and she loved it. She's the one that invited me over her house. She's the one that took me up to her room." Nate said

"You fucking liar" I screamed. Tears had begun running down my cheeks. I was glad that there were no on lookers in the parking lot, because I hated to be the spectacle.

"Come on Syd lets go" Josh pulled me towards his car. We got in and headed back to the dorms. The whole ride back was silent, besides the sound of my sniffles.

When we got back to campus, Josh walked me to my dorm. I walked inside and Stephanie wasn't there. Thank goodness. Josh followed me in and closed the door.

"Are you alright?" Josh asked. I nodded. It was silence for awhile and then I interrupted it.

"Josh I didn't enjoy it--"

"Sydney you don't have to explain..."

"No I didn't just let him do that, the only reason he was at my house was because we were working on a project for school and that's how he ended up in my room. I didn't know he would do something like that, if I did I would have never let him come over my house alone. I tried to push him off. I said no I said stop." The tears were starting back up now."I would have never done that with him willingly. I had never had sex before and I had a boyfriend, who I loved. I wouldn't have done that" I felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I let out a sigh. The tears were still running down my face though

"Sydney, you've never told anyone?" I paused.

"Not really. I mean I told my best friend and boyfriend.... Who needs friends?" I said as the tears continued to fall. " They didn't believe me Josh.  I ignored them and they took it the wrong way when he had already told them that we had mutual sex." The tears started coming more out of this whole thing. This was the part that hurt me most. My best friend and boyfriend didn't believe me. I would have never thought that it would have ended up that way, but it did.

"Sydney it's okay! Come here" He wiped my tears away with is thumbs and then embraced me in a hug. "Come on don't cry, they're not worth your tears, you're better than that okay?" I nodded and sat down on my bed. He sat beside me. I laid down and he pulled the covers on me and wrapped his arms around me and we stayed like that. I didn't mind I felt like I could stay in his arms forever