"you're in love with a girl who can't breathe and lives in a hospital. why did you choose me out of all of the fans and pretty girls that you meet everyday?"
today's the day. my life will be complete today. I'll be ok with dying after today bc I know that I've succeeded in life. my life will have a purpose after today.
My outfit was pretty basic. I was wearing a light pink sweater and some skinny jeans. My clothes were baggy from where I lost so much weight but not even baggy clothes could ruin this day. (clothes below)
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
A nurse and my mom helped me straighten my hair in the bathroom bc they were worried that I would hurt myself. I hated them doing it for me but the nurse did a better job then I normally do. Every piece of hair was bone straight and it looked so good.
After the nurse was done I decided to do my makeup. Uggh I haven't done this is in what's felt like forever. I looked in my makeup bag. I decided to go with something natural bc I didn't want to leave a bad impression on the guys. I did my foundation, concealer, and a little bit of bronzer so I didn't look so dead. I did my brows and noticed how much they needed to get waxed. I grabbed my tweezers out of my bag and started plucking. It was painful but it was gonna be worth it. Lastly, I put on some mascara and some eos. I looked in the mirror pretty satisfied. It looked pretty good considering I haven't done this In like a month. Eww wait I'm gonna add eyeshadow and some lipstick. I looked in the mirror and smiled. I felt like i was on cloud 9. (makeup pic below)
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
I looked in the mirror and smiled and made funny faces. Ever have those moments where you just feel pretty? That's how I felt as of that moment. I felt like jumping up and down and dancing. I've always been terrible at makeup bc I never had an older sister to teach me. I don't even have any siblings.
My mom grew up in small town in Georgia. Just ab everybody knew everybody and if u did something bad everyone would know by the next morning. My mom and I don't talk a lot ab her past. She said she grew up in a rough household. Her mom and dad were divorced. The dad was an alcoholic and the mom would only come around when ever she was out of jail, which wasn't very often. She didn't have any siblings. My mom had to take care of herself. My mom had a best friend named Amber when she was younger and she practically lived over with them throughout her middle school years. She said that they gave her a real family and that's all she could ever ask for. Her dad found out one day when he was sober that she was living with them and took my mom back. Which my mom was in high school now so she had friends who had cars and my mom only came home at night and never came back on the weekends. She wasn't partying she was with Amber mostly and some older kids who who sat around and played board games, watched movies, and baked. (That's my moms kind of people)
Amber one day got a boyfriend named Dean who my mom said seemed like a great guy. But after a couple of months of Amber and Dean dating he started abusing her, physically. One day he said he was going to shoot her and he shot the floor and it ricocheted up and hit Amber in the leg and Dean left Amber to die. After a couple of days of Amber not coming to school my mom went to Dean's house and found Amber dead on the ground. Investigators said that if Dean Would've taken Amber to the hospital when the bullet ricocheted, Amber would've survived. My mom couldn't deal with herself. Amber was her only friend more like family. And she all of a sudden lost her. After ambers funeral her family moved away and my mom hasn't seen them since.
A few years after ambers passing. My mom got her a boyfriend, Danny. She said he had the biggest brown eyes you've ever seen. It was the summer after senior year and my mom found out she was pregnant. She told Danny her and him were gonna have a baby. Danny told her that that wasn't his baby and he wouldn't take credit for it and he wasn't going to father it. My mom decided to run away. She ran all the way to Philadelphia and had me. She got her a job at a diner and to her luck she made a friend on the very first day and said that we could live with her and her 3 sons until we get back on our feet. My mom started going to a local college to become a business manager. A few years later she became manager of an insurance company. Now she's like the boss. We have our own house now and the lady that my mom was living with when we first moved to Philadelphia now lives in Colorado with her 3 boys and her husband. I don't remember the boys but my mom always said that we would all run around the house and drive everyone crazy. Even the neighbors. 15 years later... here we are. It's funny to think. My mom grew up in a terrible life, but she's the best person I know. She's so quiet and gentle and kind. She loves anyone and everyone she meets. She has this perfect face that makes her look younger then what she is. She's always smiling and she never sees anything bad in anyone.
Ok so maybe me and mom talk ab her past a lot.
After a while of staring at myself and admiring my art I created on my face I took a selfie and sent it to Olivia.
•text conversation•
olivia- OMG S L A Y BBYG!! 😻😻 me- lol thanks olivia- post that rn! me- ok 🙈
I posted it to Instagram and I got comments from some of my friends back at school asking if I was out of the hospital yet. I replied back: "nope but I'm getting better" and left it at that.
I walked out of the bathroom and my mom looked at me smiling. "You are so beautiful," she said smiling. She kind of wiped a tear. A smiled at her. "Ik I'm fabulous," I said striking into a pose making a funny face my mom smiled and let out a giggle.
I put on some black socks bc I didn't want to put on shoes. A nurse open the door and popped her head in. "Adeline?" She asked I turned my head finishing putting on my socks. "Magcon is here," she said.
You know that feeling you get while ur on a roller coaster and ur right at the top and ur fixing to drop and u have this stomach dropping but it tightens up feeling? That's exactly how I felt.
------------
This is the longest chapter I've ever written!! Sorry it left in a cliff hanger but it's worth it!! Thanks for over 300 views!! 🌸 (1219 words!!)
