Self Destruction is Such a Pretty Little Thing

Don't Go, I Cant Do This On My Own

Don't Go, I can't Do This Own My Own

Holy shit, it's storming like a motherfucker outside. I can't sleep; every time I get comfortable, either lightning lights up my room, or there's an overgrown mountain troll wailing outside my window. Storms are beautiful and destructive, I love taking pictures of them, but not when I'm trying to sleep. I would draw, but it would be less likely that I get any sleep tonight. I would stay up until dawn, just trying to perfect small details, that no one would really notice, anyway. I want to sleep, but I'm not all that tired anyway. My thoughts are being invaded, almost unwillingly, by someone, they're all I can really think about. Well them and the fight I had with Mikala. I'm getting real tired of her bullshit. She only fucking texts me when she has a problem, she completely forgets about me when I'm not useful. When I ask her about it and tell her that if she just doesn't want to talk to me, that she should grow a pair and tell me, she lies, and said she's been working several jobs so she can pay back a judge that put one if her exes in a $60,000 inescapable prison made especially for her murderous ex. Her jobs are babysitting eight different kids, working at a run down diner, an escort, and street fighting. Right. She just had her appendix removed a month and a half ago, so she can't fight right now, to work at a diner you have to have a work permit, which I know for a fact she doesn't have, there's not enough time in a day to work all of those jobs, AND she's supposedly been helping her dad at work. I just wished she wouldn't lie to me. Not to mention, talk about me behind my back. Whatever. Well that's that then I guess. 2/2 "best friends" that turned out to be cunts. I guess I should stick with the people I trust. I regret telling her anything. I regret meeting her. I just don't want to be lied to, I've had that done for long enough. And Mikala, if you read this(which I doubt anyway) I'm sorry, it seems like we've grown apart, I can't deal with someone who's always dragging me into drama and lying to me.

Favorite place to be alone?

The waters edge. I don't care what kind of water, anything from a creek to the ocean. If there's water, I'm happy. I'm at my happiest just sitting there a the waters edge with a book, my sketch pad, or nothing, just sitting there at the edge of the water. It's tranquil. Peaceful. I love how water can be so calm and then destroy whole cities. There's so much power in watt. I love it. When I was younger I always thought of myself as the reverse Ariel, from the little mermaid. (Don't judge me thats my all time favorite disney movie)Instead of trading my voice for legs, I would happily trade my family for fins. I wanted to get away from here, even then. And even better, I wanted to live under the sea.

Don't Go-Bring Me The Horizon