Self Destruction is Such a Pretty Little Thing

Someone, Somewhere

Someone, Somewhere

"Even though I'm on my own, I know I'm not alone. 'Cuz I know there's someone somewhere, praying that I make it home. Here's one from the heart. My life right from the start. I need a home sweet home, to call my own. To call my own. Oh. It was you that told me I could do this. You put the music in my heart. The way you sang with the band in Memphis. It's hard just to be strong, not knowing if I done you proud. I like to imagine the smile when you hear my songs..." -Someone Somewhere Asking Alexandria

I'm sorry for all the random ass song lyrics lately, but this song came on and it reminded me of someone on here. And I figured since I was planning on updating today anyway, might as well add that to the top. And to that person, you know who you are c:

I was so fucking proud of myself today, but then I had to go and fucking ruin it. My calorie total for today was under 250, but then my sister had to go and fucking cook country fried steak and gravy, mashed potatoes, and field peas and snaps. I couldn't not eat without raising further suspicion. Not from my parents, obviously. But from Jess at least. God damn it. I didn't even purge. All those fucking calories are swimming around in my stomach and it makes me feel disgusting . Then my dad yelled at me for a good thirty minutes about how Donatello's water filter was tilted and that it was all my fault that we lost the other suction cuppy thing in the move. And that I was the biggest mistake of their lives. My mom thought she was infertile after my sister do the didn't bother using a condom and then out pops me. A month early and super asthmatic. Not only because my premature birth but because she smoked her entire pregnancy with me. So not only were my lungs fucked at birth but afterwords as well. Now that I'm living in a house where three out of five smoke cigarettes, my lungs are probably in the verge of collapsation. I can't fucking wait till college, no fucking parents no sister nothing. Just me my classes and possibly friends. All I want to do is leave this town, get a photography gig at National Geographic or something, save my money and get a house in Atlanta, Savannah, or New York, or any where in Europe. Sigh. Italy, France, Spain, Germany, Greece, hell I wouldn't mind Japan either. I just want to see the world make my opinions about it known through my photos. Show the world how I think. I just need to get out of here. But then again, I'll probably fall into the footsteps set out before me. Don't go to college, live In this fucking state forever, never leaving to go somewhere extravagant, throw my life away for stupid insignificant things and and spend the rest of my life struggling to get by and juggle an addiction to illegal substances. Lovely. Actually that reminds me of a kind of funny story. Yesterday I came downstairs for dinner, I was reading in my room. My eyes were tired after reading for so long. My mom stares at me for a good three minutes and straight asks me if I'm on drugs because "I looked out of it" and "loopy'. I said no, beside my prescription, of course. She didn't believe me and looked kind of disappointed. Which is somewhat funny, because I'm the only one in this family who DOESN'T use any narcotics. I don't know if that was actually funny or not, but I enjoyed the irony, none the less.

Title/Song Exert from Someone Somewhere by Asking Alexandria

I don't know man, I really like that song. And all of their other songs. And albums. And members. I just really love Asking Alexandria, okay?