Mandy's POV
That night after the show
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Another show down. I'm sitting with Luke and Telle. I'm telling them what happened at Starbucks.
"-So, he threatened to take you to your biological parents and thought abandoning you was okay?!" Telle asked. I nodded.
"What drugs is he on?" Luke asked.
"I have no fucking idea" I shrugged.
"At least you know exactly what happened" he pointed out.
"True, but it still hurts" I told him. He hugged me and pecked me on the lips.
"Telle, can Luke and I talk in private? I need to ask him something" I asked. Telle nodded and got up. He walked over to Zack and Chris.
"What's up?" Luke asked, nuzzling his head into my neck.
"Luke, I'm not trying to be a bitch or anything. I only like you as a friend" I told him.
"Thank you for telling me, I appreciate your honestly and not leading me on. Can I still hug you and stuff?" He asked.
"Yeah, you can hug me and cuddle with me. You can't kiss me, though" I told him.
"Before we establish that we're only friends and that's all we'll ever be, can I kiss you?" He asked.
"Uh... Sure" I said. He leaned in and softly pressed his lips to mine. The kiss didn't last very long, so I guess he respected that it was only one kiss.
"So, I saw you talking to Mike from Prada this morning, what's up with you two?" He asked.
"Nothing yet, he's charming though, he gave me his number" I told him.
"Are you gonna try to test this out with him?" He asked.
"Maybe, he seems like a nice guy and he's not bad looking" I replied.
"Well, only do what you want to do. If you try things out with him and you just don't feel right with him. Don't lead him on" he told me.
"Luke, relax, I'm not like that. I'm normally very truthful about those type of things" I said.
"I know, Mandy, but I'm looking out for you, I don't want you to get hurt or get yourself in a bad spot. I care about you" he said. I gave him a hug.
"Thanks, Lukey" I said.
"You're welcome and don't call me that!" He whined.
"Lukey! Lukey!" I teased.
"Stop..." He whined.
"I'm just messing with you, Holland. I'm gonna go head back to MIW's bus" I told him.
"Alright, I'll see you later alligator" he said. I chuckled. He's such a dork.
I walked back to Motionless in White's bus. I opened the door. Nobody was in there because everybody is hanging out.
I walked to the back lounge and turned on the TV. It's like eleven at night so Family Guy should be on.
I sat down on the couch and turned it to the channel that had Family Guy.
I looked over to noticed Ryan glaring at me. The fuck is his problem?
"What" I snapped.
"I wanted quiet" he said.
"Then go to your fucking bunk Ryan" I growled.
"No. I was here first, you go to your bunk." He shot back.
"No. There's only one TV. I'm not leaving ." I said in the same tone.
"Well. I'm not leaving either" he said.
"This isn't gonna work" I said.
"Well, let's have a fucking staring contest, the loser has to leave" he smirked. I rolled my eyes and we both got up.
He's so much taller than me. He looked down at me and I looked up at him. The lighting is making his brown eyes look like a hazel-y brown color. His eyes are really pretty, right now. I could get lost in them. In fact, I kind of am. Amanda! Stop! You hate him! You're not allowed to like any characteristic of him! Not even his eyes!
I stared into his eyes some more. Neither of us blinked. Then I noticed his face getting closer to mine. His hands rested on my hips and his lips touched mine.
I didn't close my eyes during this kiss nor did he. I think he did this to make me lose the staring contest.
Our lips moved in sync. He scooted us over to the door and he shut the door and locked it.
He pushed me down onto the couch and straddled my hips. His lips moved away from mine and moved down to my neck. His hands roamed up my shirt and snaked their way to my back and unhooked my bra.
I took off my shirt and flung it across the small room.
"Try not to make a sound" he whispered in my ear, his lips went down to my neck and he lightly bit it, causing me to moan.
I think you guys know where this is going.
-
We're done. I'm wearing his shirt and a face full of regret. Why did I have sex with him again?
I'm so stupid. This is the second time I've slept with a guy I hate. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him.
This needs to stop. I haven't questioned myself so much before Chris forced me to stay with Ryan for a couple days.
I'm questioning if I even hate Ryan, anymore. I hate him. I know I do. Why do I let what he says affect me?
