Hospital Visits [Narry]

Bench

(Harry)

"But, sadly he has got amnesia" he said and now I think I dropped my heart. Niall, amnesia? No. This can't be true. He can't. He have to remember me and Aaron. What can I tell Aaron? It's not simple to just tell your own kid "oh your mummy don't remember you". He has been into too many things this week. I don't want to break him even more.

"I know this is hard for you, but we are going to do our best to take his memory back with the medecin he will take. But I'm not sure when he can get back his memory, sometimes it can take one week, one month, one year or they maybe don't even get it back"

I was completely dry in the mouth. I had lost the words , I could not form any sentences . I was completely speechless. I feel so empty, it feels like there is a hole in my heart. Only Niall can fix it. I don't know what to do. I can't even cry. What is wrong with me?

I couldn't sit there a minute more, I excused myself and burst out from the room. I ran and ran, I even sometimes brushed my shoulder against someone else. I don't care. I don't fucking care if they think I'm an idiot. I feel lost. Niall have to remember. I can't sit at home and grid stor while Niall is living his life without me and Aaron in his life.

That is the last thing I want.

When I had exit the hospital I decided to send a message to Liam to let him know I'm going to be little late.

It's dark outside and it was pretty cold outside so I could see how it was formed in small clouds from my mouth when I breathed out. I found a bench a few metres away. I walked towards it and when my bum hit the cold, hard bench I puffed out. But I will get used to it. I looked up to see thousands, millions of stars. Once me and Niall tried to count the stars to see who could do it. But both gave up and realized there is too many of them.

I wished my life didn't was so hard. Or is it me who is doing my life so hard, than it actually is.

I feel a tear which falls from my eyes and this time I don't even think about to stop them. I just let them stream out from my eyes. I have never felt this sad before, ever.

But if you love someone so much that it hurts, the worst thing is to let them go. I really hope this is just a dream, more like a nightmare and soon I'm going to wake up in Niall's and mine bed with Aaron between us. Just cuddle with them the whole morning.

How much I wished it was a nightmare it's not. I burried my head in my shaking hands. My whole body was shaking, maybe because I was so cold. Who cares. Not me. I can sit here and wait until Niall come and remember me. If he don't remember me it's not worth it.

I love him.

I love him with my whole heart.

I love him so much that I would chose to sit here and cry in thousand years.

I miss his arms wrapped around my waist. How his lips taste on mine. His hand in mine.

I chose to lie down on my back, then I let the back of my head meet the cold. I stared at the stars with tears still streaming down over my cheeks. They was burning inside my eyes but when they fell out from my eyes they were cold.

I hugged myself to keep me a little warm. I shiver everytime there is a cold wind blowing against the side of my body. You could hear how my teeth met each other every second. It is fucking May but it feels like december. And I'm freezing to the death.

I'm happy that Niall isn't dead, but I still have these feelings that I'm hurt. It's like Niall took my heart with him in the crash and my heart split in pieces.

I'm so dramatic. But I can't be positive about this. Actually think if Niall would not be able to remember anything. Anyone.

If there is someone he not should remember it's his father. He is in jail because he killed his mother for some unknown reason. He don't want to say why. He have been there for almost ten years. Can you believe it? Niall was ten when his mom died and because of his dad. And his dad getting to jail ater that. Niall haven't grown up with his parents. Just the half of it. I just want to cry even more when I think about how much he has been going trough. But right now I don't even think I can cry more.

I took a deep breath, again, again and again. I shut my eyes. I kept on with taking deep breaths. They were shaky.

I saw a picture of Niall with someone else. He looked so happy, his smile was the biggest and they were hugging and kissing each other all the time.

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Hey everyone!

I hope you liked this chapter, I know it's just harry's feelings in this chapter but I felt like I had to. I don't know if you had a feeling when u read this but if u had, commmmment! :)))

I have been sitting in front of the computer in the middle of the night, when I wrote this so I don't know how it was but if u liked it vote :* xx

Louis a dad, gosh that's so cuteeee! Think about it, an little tomlinson 2 running around.

Lots of love
- Narryshipper