Forever Luna

Sentiment

noun ~ a view of or attitude toward a situation or event

NOVA

I felt tense.

My entire body was stiff with unease, anxiety swirling in my mind and churning up the breakfast in my stomach. I had skipped lunch, too nauseas to comprehend eating any food at this point in the day. Phoenix was none the wiser. Thankfully too busy with party details to keep such a close eye on me.

In less than an hour, they expected me to greet our guests on the porch of the ballroom with Phoenix by my side. I have been around these wolves before, but never to the point of having the responsibility of catering to them. I had planned decorations, food, drinks, music... Everything was prepared, and nothing had gone wrong so far.

It was a miracle.

A suspicious miracle.

For now, I was anxious about cleaning the kitchen. Picture it. Me, Nova Hope, cleaning my kitchen in a ball gown with marigold gloves up to my elbows.

What better thing to do with my time whilst the twins slept? They took up all of my time, and when they were sleeping, I used it as an excuse to do nothing. But today, my mind couldn't settle on nothing, and something had to be done.

I felt apprehensive about tonight going ahead, but Phoenix continually reassured me everything was fine. He had extra guards, patrols, security checks... He even convinced Gaia to hold a spell to warn any unwanted guests away. Like I said, everything was suspiciously going to plan.

Couldn't just one thing go wrong? Just to appease my anxious mind?

Perhaps the balloons explode, or the cake falls, or the twins throw up on each other and I'm out of the ballroom for another bathing and changing them...

All sounded like great ideas to me.

Sighing, I tore off my gloves with defeat. There was nothing else I could clean! If it wasn't my mother coming round and cleaning, it was the 'secret' maid that Phoenix hired to come in here every time I went out for lunch with the girls.

I had scrubbed the hob, the oven doors, the sink, the tap, even every door and shelf going. I could rearrange the cupboards around, but I knew that would take too long, and I'd end up in more mess than I wanted.

Washing my hands under my nice clean tap, I felt the agitated desire to glance at the clock.

Again.

Peeking one eye to my left, I groaned softly when I saw that I still had thirty minutes to go.

But in thirty minutes meant my escort would be here any second now.

Sitting on the sofa, I evened out the invisible creases in my dress. Somehow, Molly had found me a dress that I actually liked. Dragging me shopping was always a chore, especially because I could never make my mind up. She had given me a total of five dresses to try on before I gave into the lure of the cream one.

It was a tight halter neck, tied at the back of my neck with a loose bow. The skirt was plentiful, reaching my ankles and just skimming the floor. The entire dress was a smooth satin, but there was an extra chiffon layer across the bodice. Although light in colour, I felt the most comfortable in this one, purely down to the loose waistband and how well it hid my lower half.

Phoenix may say I am beautiful, but he was biased. He barely sees the marks, the discolouring, the scars that litter my body. I appreciate them, know their worth, but at the same time, it makes me sad about how much my body has changed. I didn't want to be selfish. I didn't want to self-loathe, but sometimes, I just felt uncomfortable wearing old clothes.