SEBASTIAN AND HIS ZAZI

chapter 41: changed her world

Zazi really missed her mother. She must be worried about her.

But what can she do? Its not safe to go back there at that moment and she couldn't bring her here, This wasn't her and how and she gave this man three mouths already. Well, Lily was breastfeeding and tito was just a dog, so technically one and a little one for the dog.... But still.
So she just prayed her mother was fine.

A month had passed. And Nderu had kept the child as she promised.
Had she grown fond of it as Mumbi hoped? No!
Every single time she saw it she saw Luke forcing herself on her the first time on the storage. How ashamed she felt. How she cleaned herself so many times to gey that man's stench off of her before presenting herself to her husband.

And it even had his birthmark, his eyes, his hair.
She just felt resentment.

A child of someone else shouldn't be in her husband's home. She couldn't stand her.

She took too long to feed her and change her, sometimes mumbi would have to do that herself when she came to help her.

Nderu had had enough of this child. She wanted it gone. She wasn't of her husband, she was as a result of rape and that was enough not to love it.
So she called on one of the new leaders.

"I was assaulted by a white man. When i got pregnant, which I found out after my husband died, i thought it might be his, his only heir. Because he died before were  blessed us with one. I was happy. But then it turned out to be the seed of the white man, a rancher of the lockwood farm, who took what was of my husband and dirtied it. And that is what i feel when i see this child. A dirty product. My pride being scarred. And the fact that she is white, ruins out pure lineage. I want you to help me do what we do."

The elder wondered why she held on, hid the baby for this long but said nothing. She wanted it to discrete so only he and her would know.

The baby was  always sent down by an elder as a way of cleansing village
They went to the river with him carrying the basket with the child.

The baby didn't have to be put in a basket, it could be easily just covered in clothes and sent down, it would drown eventually.

But nderu's hate was too much. She wanted this child to make it to the crocodiles. To feel the terror and fear as they fight for the basket and then bite through her flesh.

And so, the baby was sent down the river.

That day, in Arnold's manor, zazi and Arnold were getting to know each other as it was a norm for the past days. They kept talking and that's when she learnt despite his age he wasn't married.

"Why is that? You haven't found the right one?"

"No, I did!"

"Oww.  Wait was the clothes I wore before hers? Is she dead?"

"Haha! Yes. Wait, yes that the clothes were hers but no, she isn't dead!"

Zazi didn't understand then why they weren't together.

The concept of divorce was something she had never seen before.

A man owned a woman, heart, body and soul the moment they got married. And that was for life.

The only way a married man could be single again would be if the wife died or did some terrible thing that she got cast out of the village and the husband had to cut ties with her.

But then he would get himself a new wife.

"Then why aren't you two together."
He couldn't tell her, could he?

Maybe one day, but not today. Maybe some day.
That was not something he was proud to say and not something you say to anyone.

"I'll tell you soon."

Zazi nodded. Maybe it was too sensitive. She was even angry at herself for asking.

She tried to stop herself but she kept comparing him to Sebastian.

He had cold features you could assume he as mean but when you get to know him, you realize he is actually a sweet soul.

Sebastian appeared as an angel. Turns out he was the exact opposite and was a manipulative human being.

She made other compares  about appearances, smiles. But she didn't want to decide a winner.

She should just stop thinking about sebastian all together and stop thinking of what Arnold did to her to what Sebastian did.

But then one thing that didn't leave, is Sebastian promised  11 years ago he would free her only to ran on her twice.

And without a promise, Arnold immediately gives her a free life. She even had papers to show she was a free slave. It was like an identification card.

Only free slaves had one and you had to have it at all times because the moment you leave the ranch, you meet the officials of the new government, like the police, they will ask you for it. You can even get arrested.

Arnold changed her world and with the snap of his fingers.

But then Arnold seemed to have a lot of power, even more than Jacob.

People respected him and when they went to town, she easily saw this. It was like walking with loyalty.

He had important guests, rich snobby type. The kind that are too good for this, too rich for that.

One thought zazi was a servant and ordered her to get her some water with a harsh tone. Zazi wanted to go because she was being hospitable to guests but also tell her she wasn't a maid. 

But the woman was dismissive saying a peasant like her had no right to speak to her.

Arnold heard this and introduced zazi as a woman he was seeing, a girlfriend concept, surprising zazi too. The woman didn't say anything and was quiet the whole time, even forgot her water but she clearly disapproved this.

He was a powerful man, why settle for someone beneath him?

Zazi didn't say anything about this. And didn't think too much of it.