Sometimes

Emotions

Seb POV

She kissed me, she is kissing me. I never thought she would, I thought I would have to be the one to make the first move but here I am finally kissing this woman. Ever since I met her there has just been something there, she is everything I could ever want in a woman and I truly care for her. I didn't know if she was even ready for this. I place my hands on her cheeks and pull her closer. Her fingers run through my hair as my thumbs caress her cheeks.

She pulls away and leans her forehead against mine, she is breathing deeply and as she looks up at me I see tears fall from her eyes.
"Lizzy?"
She pulls away completely and gets up of the sofa "I shouldn't have done that Seb I'm sorry"
I stand and walk towards her but she puts her hands up to stop me.
"I'm sorry Seb, I think you should go"
"Lizzy please..."
"I'm sorry. Please I need you to go"
I nod and take a deep breath, I grab my coat walking towards the door. I take one more look at her before walking through the door and closing it.

I hear her breakdown as I close the door, god why did this have to happen. I know she isn't healed yet, she still misses her husband and right now she probably feels like rubbish. I decide to call Chris and tell him she needs him. I want to be the one to comfort her but I know she doesn't want to see me right now.

Lizzy POV

I'm curled up in a ball on the sofa, still crying unable to turn off the emotions I'm feeling. I can't believe I kissed him. I'm married wether Josh is here or not I'm still married and I shouldn't have been kissing another man when my husband is dead. I hear the door open and closing and I know Seb has called Chris. He probably heard me breakdown when he left. I open my eyes and see Chris bending down in front of me. A soft smile on his face, he pushes my hair from my face and cups my cheek.

"Come on Lizzy"
I slowly get up and he sits down next to while I curl into him and cry into his chest. I don't know how long I am there for but when I finally stop I look up at chris and he smiles down at me.
"He hates me doesn't he?"
"Seb?"
I nod "no Lizzy he doesn't, he's worried about you and he feels awful"
I sit up and wipe my face "it's not his fault chris, it's mine. I shouldn't have kissed him"
"Lizzy? Can I ask why?"
"What do you mean why? Why do you think?"

I stand start pacing "because of Josh?" Chris asks
"Of course because of Josh, he's my husband"
"Lizzy. He was your husband and he loved you more then anything in this world but it's been 5 years liz you are entitled to move on. He wouldn't want you alone for the rest of your life"
I stand shocked at what he has just said to me "Josh wasn't just a husband, he was my soulmate. He was my everything since we were 3 years old. I can't just move on from that"
"I'm not saying you should but Lizzy you can't stay in this grief for the rest of your life. He wouldn't want you feeling guilty all the time"

"You don't understand Chris, you don't care about love. You just sleep with anything with legs"
I can tell I've upset him, he stands and places his hands on his hips as he shakes his head.
"You don't think I want what you and Josh had. I envied you two. You were everything I wanted. But Lizzy you can't keep living like this. Seb is a great guy and he really likes you and you've hurt him."
I can't help but cry more because I knew he was right, I had hurt Seb. I kicked him out and he did nothing wrong. I don't know what I'm going to do, I can't imagine moving on from Josh, I wouldn't even know how to.