Maybe you aren't as bad as you were before.

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Y/n's POV. oh my god finally
Also, warning, a bit of angst. and transphobia

Friday March 13
I sprinted as fast as I could down the hallway. School wasn't over yet but I had to get out of here. I had gotten a text from Roy. It said that his mom had found his closet stuff and took that book with everything else. 
Something weird I noticed was that he didn't text the group chat. He just texted me. He was probably just panicked and forgot. He probably texted everyone else afterward.
"Y/n! Don't run in the- WOAH!" Said the hall monitor. I ran past her without stopping.
Roy was sick today and that was why he wasn't at school. As I was running I saw Robert emerge from a side hallway. He was running at the same pace. 
"Robert hey! Did you get the text?" I said once I caught up to him.
"Oh.. Y/n.. Hey!" He said breathlessly. "Yeah I.. I got it!" 
"Cool cool. Looks like we had the same idea!" I said. 
"Heh heh. Yeah." 
We burst out the front doors of the school and continued our sprint down the sidewalk.
"We are.. gonna be.. in so much.. trouble!" I said
"Let's not.. think about.. that right now." Robert said.
We both laughed at that. 
We made it to Roy's house quickly at the pace we were moving. We both clambered over the fence and ran around to the side to stand under Roy's window. 
"Rapunzel Rapunzel! Let down your long hair!" I called up. Robert snickered.
Though nobody came to the window. There was no response.
"You try." I said to Robert.
"Roy? We're here!" He shouted.
Still nothing.
"Well ok then. Maybe he isn't in his room. We can just climb up and wait for him." I said.
"What? We can't climb up a smooth wall!" Said Robert.
"I can." I said. "My dad was really into rock climbing and parkor so he taught me a few things."
I grew a bit sad as I remembered my father. 
"Oh! That's really friggin cool, actually! I'll wait down here, you throw the rope down!" He said.
"Heh thanks. I'll do that." I said sheepishly.
I turned to the wall and scanned the surface. This one wouldn't be too hard. I backed up and ran at the wall. I used the momentum to push myself upwards. I was just barely able to grab the window sill before falling back down. If I fell from this height I would certainly break something. I hoisted myself up through the window and looked around. The lights weren't on so the room was kinda dark. I was just about to grab the sheet rope from beside the window when I heard a noise. 
"Sniff."
It came from the closet. I crept over to the wardrobe and knocked on the door lightly.
"What?" Said a harsh voice from inside. It was Roy.
"Roy, it's me. You texted us?" I said.
"How did you get in?" He said in a surprised voice.
"I climbed the wall. My dad taught me how."
"Oh. That's weird." 
"Can I.. Can I come in?" 
There was a pause.
"Yeah.."
"Alright."
I opened the doors to find Roy sitting curled up in a corner hugging the salt lamp. I squeezed into the closet, sat in the opposite corner from him and closed the doors. All the walls were bare. They had been stripped of every spec of personality. 
"Damn.. they really cleared this place out." I said, stating the obvious.
"They took the book, too." Said Roy.
"They didn't take the pride flag." I said, pointing at the little sticker.
"That's just because they couldn't get it unstuck. The only reason they supported me is because they wanted a son in the first place. I'm not allowed to let anyone know to keep up our 'perfect reputation' or whatever." He said bitterly.
"Oh.. I'm sorry." I replied.
"Yeah, it's whatever." He said, turning his head away.
"I'm serious! No one should have to deal with shit like this. This kind of thing affects kids and changes them. A loving, supporting home life usually makes for loving, supporting kids with-  with good mental health! But a neglectful, abusive home life makes kids turn out like.. like.." I trailed off. Every bad thing that Hatzgang had done to me flashed through my mind. Every bad thing that Roy did.
"Like me." He finished.
I turned back toward him. I saw that tears had started welling up in his eyes and he clutched the salt lamp tighter.
"Roy.. the things that you have done to other people weren't right by any means, but shitty home environments make shitty kids. Things should have been different for you." I said quietly.
Roy didn't say anything. Tears started to fall silently down his face.
"Oh Roy.. I wish someone would help you." I said softly. I scooted a bit closer to him, careful not to touch him.  
Roy then did something I never expected. He wrapped his arms around me and buried his face in my side. He was crying harder now and his tears were soaking up my clothes but I didn't care. I gently wrapped my arms around him, still a bit surprised at his sudden action.
"I'm sorry." Whispered Roy after a while. 
I blinked in surprise.  
"Thank you." I replied.
"I don't know why.. I don't.. ugh. I don't like.. this." 
"What?"
"Me."
I nodded.
"The things you did to me hurt for a long time and it will take a while for me to trust you again but.. but I'm willing to give you a second chance. If you can promise not to hurt me again." I said.
Roy gripped my shirt tighter and nodded.
"Alright."
We just sat there for a moment. What just happened? Did I really say all of that? Sometimes it feels like just yesterday we were beating the shit out of each other over a broken T R I N K E T. Maybe this isn't perfect, but it's better than whatever we had before. This can lead to something safer, something more stable. Forgiving someone immediately can lead to even more bad situations, but if you don't give someone the chance to change, then there could potentially be one less good person in the world and I'm sure you know we need more of those. Try to maintain balance. Improvement isn't perfect, though I'm sure you would already know that, You. Keep it up.

Roy eventually stopped crying and took a deep breath.
"Do you feel any better now?" I asked.
"Um.. I mean.. I guess so.." He said.
"Alright. That's good." I said. Then I remembered something. "Oh shit! Robert!"
"What? What about him?" Roy said.
"Robert's here, too! He came with me! He can't climb up the wall so I said I would drop the rope down for him! He's probably super confused right now!" I said frantically as I scrambled to get out of the closet.
"Oh. Oh!" Said Roy, absorbing what I just said.
I ran to the window and looked over the edge of the window sill.
"Oh! Hi, Y/n! What happened? What took you so long?" Called Robert.
"Hey Rob! Sorry about that! Here!" I said, ignoring his question. I tossed the rope down to him and he climbed up.
"Oh hey Roy!" said Robert after he noticed Roy standing next to me.
"Hey, Rob. Sorry for the wait. Y/n tripped awkwardly and I had to get them a bandaid." Said Roy.
"I did not, you little gremlin!" I shoved him with my shoulder and he burst out laughing.
"Did I.. miss something?" asked Robert.
"Nope!" Said Roy, wiping his eyes.
"Alright guys. Focus. How are we gonna get that little book back?" I said.

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