Loving Anna

Lyssa-Chapter 14

She. Saw. The. Messages. No no no tonight couldn't end like this...she blocked me. None of my calls or texts went through. She ran off and left me with a broken phone, broken strap, and broken heart. Anna didn't understand what those messages were. Why didn't she...no I know why she didn't wait I wouldn't have either. I has to explain it to her somehow...Justin was worse than I said he was and Anna needed to understand that. She needed to understand me. I shouldn't have allowed myself to have sex with her without telling her everything about my life. I searched through my phone and saw the call Anna probably picked up with Justin. No god no what did he tell her. I called his number and he picked up on the second ring "Lyssa why the fuck are you calling at like 1 am." He groaned. "A girl called you earlier what did you say to her." I asked. He snorted "I told her that you guys were fuck buddies and that you had told me all about it...who even was that." I hung up the phone. Of course jealous Justin had to go and ruin everything. I instantly regretted hanging up knowing I would get so much backlash from him but I didn't care. He had said all that to Anna and none of it was true. It hurt even more that Anna ran away without even asking me. She didn't know anything yet acted like she knew everything. I got another call from Justin but just clicked ignore. Looking through Justin and my messages to see what she had seen and saw the nudes...my nudes that were years old. Stupid mistake sending them to him. I didn't even take new ones I just knew that if I didn't send them he would have...and I didn't want to hurt Anna like that but clearly it still did. I didn't blame her for being hurt but why didn't she just talk to me. I thought we truly had a good night up until this point and if she had just stuck around instead of breaking shit then this could have been avoided. We were honestly both the idiots in the scenario...but I couldn't let this go unexplained. I was upset with her, yes but that didn't mean I wanted her to keep being upset with me. I walked over to her house almost at 2 am and knocked on her front door. No one answered but I heard the crash of furniture and backed away. This is what Justin did when he got angry with me. He threw furniture and all my things he trashed everything. But Anna couldn't be like Justin...if she was it was only a matter of time before she started the abuse cycle too. Another relationship like that...that would finish me off. I can't deal with someone who loves me but also degrades me and sometimes end up slapping me. I couldn't destroy my boundaries for Anna. She couldn't be the one...the one who finally made me believe there was no on in the world who would love me. Justin didn't love me. Maybe it was only a matter of time...when Anna couldn't love me anymore either. "Lyssa" Anna said. I couldn't do it...if she wanted an explanation she could get it from me herself but right now...all I could do was turn around...and run.