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Chapter 69. "A Moment of Silence."

The more a man is silent, the more he begins to speak intelligibly.

Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

- What could be scarier than losing a loved one?

Again the question and again there is no right answer...

How hard it is to realize that a loved one is gone, how scary it is to feel broken, empty and alone...

When loved ones leave us, the very people with whom we go through fire and water, endure the thorny path and continue to hold our hand...

Edmund and Joanna's story turned a full three hundred and sixty degrees after Ed decided to confess everything... maybe it would have meant something, maybe something could have been stopped... or maybe you really shouldn't have told anyone.

Ed stayed in a coma, a week of tears and anguish passed, but unfortunately nothing changed, he didn't come back, he decided for everyone, he made his decision and thought it was the right one, just to stay there somewhere in the sky and not come back...

Today is his last day, they're taking him off the ventilator...

It's a farewell day with friends and family... Everyone arrived, only Edmund's mother stepped on the threshold of the hospital immediately collapsed in shock and realization that she had lost, the one and only son...

- What's on Tony's mind? No one knows, he had disappeared since the day the doctor gave a clear answer that his brother would be gone, he probably drank and started to take drugs to somehow forget the pain that was in him, no one knows if he will come back today and find the strength to look at the dead body of his brother ...

Sean's soul is shattered, it must be very hard for him, realizing that the man he loved, the man who was everything to him and a friend and a brother just won't appear before him anymore, won't joke and mock, because that person will no longer be in his life...

Sandra, Stacy and Vivian's soul hurt, but probably not as Joan's or Daniel's, though the girls loved Ed, but they understood inside that he betrayed them, left them and exchanged by another girl, but anyway whatever was in those girls' minds, they had only the best memories of Edmund Wright...

- How does Joanna feel? It seems that it must be Daniel who is the hardest, because he has to keep silent, to pretend that he mustn't lose heart, he must fight for life, he is tired of playing and he would like to drop this mask of duplicity and finally show everybody his broken soul, to cry in his full breast, to break everything around and just shout, but he could not, because he had Joan the same girl who had been in love with Dan since their first meeting, he looked at her as if she were an Angel, a person whose soul was full of love and happiness, but that was then, now she was different, broken and miserable, her life had changed a hundred and eighty degrees she had lost the meaning of life, now opening her eyes she saw no bright pictures, saw no color, everything for her had become dark and empty. .. their love was only budding and could never have a continuation for a happy ending...

Joanna Morris was weaker, more cowardly, and now she was defeated because the darkness had crushed and defeated her...

She did not know what to do next, how to live, fight and just breathe oxygen, everything ended, in one day she lost her loved one and herself, she was left alone among all this heaviness...

Now her life will never be the same...

***
- I ask one person at a time to come through," the doctor approached Edmund's family.

- Who are the ideas first? - Asked Sean.

- I'll go," Oscar said and followed the doctor. Inside himself he felt empty, though Oscar played a small role in Edmund's life, they were still good friends, and walking into the cold, lonely ICU room, where his friend lay in the middle of the room, hooked up to various devices, Oscar's heart involuntarily squeezed... they had been through so much together... - ran through his head, there was so much he wanted to do and now he was gone, is life fair?

Oskar sat down beside his friend and took his hand, he looked at the sleeping Ed and hoped that most likely he was just sleeping... Ed liked to joke, maybe he would wake up abruptly and look into his friend's eyes and smile at him again?

- Ed, it's time to wake up... - uttered Oscar with a trembling voice, hoping to see his friend's cheerful eyes, but it wasn't happening, he couldn't hear him...

- Are you offended by me? Tell me, I'll do anything to see you cheerful and happy again... - Oskar said and understood that the tears rolled down his cheeks, yes, he never showed his weakness, he tried to be strong, but Ed knew him, though they had not talked much lately, they were close friends and when it was difficult for Oskar he could call his friend and tell him everything, in his turn Ed did everything to make Oskar not feel lonely and unwanted, he was always there and ready to give a helping hand at any moment...

- Edie," Oscar began to cry, "I do not know why exactly you were taken from me, why are you lying here? Was it your fault? Why did life do this to you? - Crying, the boy asked a lot of questions, he did not get the answer he needed...

- I'm sorry for everything, I was a terrible friend and I know it, I know that I was not always there, sometimes I did not answer your calls because I communicated with other people and thought that they were more important to me, I feel like a moral monster, I did not want to do this to you and I am very ashamed that I tell you about it only now, ashamed to admit that you were the best person in my life, I beg you to forgive me ... - He finished and then the doctor came in.

- Time's up, let the others say goodbye...

- I will always love you, Edmund Wright. You are forever in my heart, not just as a friend, but as an example of a real man. Rest in peace. - After kissing him on the forehead, Oscar left his friend and walked out of the ICU...

Sean came next, he saw Ed lying down and immediately cried, he could not hold back his emotions, it was very hard for him to accept the fact that he would never see his friend again, he sat down next to him and just cried, he could not stop the flow of his tears, he was very hurt, and this feeling was killing him from the inside...

- Ed," he barely said his friend's name, "I know you can hear me, I know you're here somewhere," he looked around and continued, "I want you to come back to us," he cried again, "I can't do this without you, my world just collapsed and I don't know how to live anymore... I know you never read that letter I wrote you and you know it's for the best because I wrote bad things, I was angry at you, at what you did to me, but when I came back and everything was back to normal, I went to therapy and forgot about drugs, the first person I thought of was you and you know I was terribly ashamed of that letter I sent you, yes Sandra did wrong, but I didn't believe her, I couldn't because I knew you weren't like that... and yes, I knew you opened a bank account for me, and believe me I felt you cared about me, that our friendship would always exist even if we weren't friends... now looking at everything that happened to us, I would take all the time back and be there for you, I lost you because of my own stupidity and stupidity, you are the best thing in my life Ed, you are the best and true friend, who in spite of everything was there for me... и... - Sean cried again, - it's so hard for me without you, I don't know how I'll live the rest of my life knowing you're not around... - covered his face with his hand, Sean couldn't hold back, -why? Why did this happen? - He didn't know the answer to his question, and he knew that by staying in this place he wouldn't be able to hold himself back. - I'm sorry for bringing you so much trouble, I'm a bad friend and I'm ashamed of myself, I'm sorry Edie... you will always live in my heart. - He kissed his hand and walked out, Sean couldn't contain his emotions and just ran out into the street...

- Who's next? - Asked the doctor and everyone around looked at each other...

From the author:

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