Pregame Saiouma/Oumasai DRV3

Rants, cuddles, and a twisted mental state.

Shuichi Pov. 

I made me a snack as I waited for Kokichi. They better not be hurting my Kichi. I swear to god if they're hurting my Kichi...

I heard a soft knock at the door, and I opened it with a smile.

"Kichi!" I let him in. "How are you, beloved?"

"Mh...I'm mad." He pouted as he stepped inside. 

"Mad? What, did something happen? Did they...do something to you?"

"No, n-not really. They just...mmn." He grabbed a pillow and collapsed on the bed. I closed the door as he ranted. "They drag me all the way out there, just so they can do something about you! They expected me to plan against you behind your back! What kind of person do they think I am?" 

"Baby..." I mumbled as I crawled next to him. He seems really upset right now. "Rant to me more, love. What other stupid things did they do?"

"They were shocked, fucking flabbergasted, when I tried to leave!" He thrust his hands into the air, waving them around as if someone were there, listening to him. "They even expected me to be mad at you! I mean, yeah, you did what you did, but at least you know when you do something wrong. But noooo, they're always fucking right. So high and mighty. They should all just go choke on a sandpaper cock!" 

I laughed at that last comment -I couldn't help it- and he started to laugh too. His little giggles made my chest flutter. 

"Maybe I'm...exaggerating a bit." He said, looking down.

"No, no. Let's go find a sandpaper cock!" I teased.

"Don't be m-mean to me." He pouted, but I could see the playful gleam in his eyes. I laughed at his silliness.

"Mmn...you're the best, you know." 

"N-No, you're the best...you let me r-rant to you, even if I'm being u-unreasonable."

"No, you were being reasonable. They are stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid."

I heard his lovely giggles yet again. "No~ not the 11037 reference!"

"Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid!" I grinned as I started to tickle him. "Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid!"

"S-Stop tic-kling me!" He shouted, choking on his laughter. "Sh-umai- t-tha-t's e-nough!" 

"Okay, okay." I wrapped my arms around him. We both smiled at each other. 

"How do you d-do that? You a-always make me feel b-better..."

"I do what I can, love." I smiled. "I love you so, so much."

"I love you too, Shumai...but...a-aren't you worried?"

"Worried? About what?"

"They want to do something bad to you...aren't you worried about that? They even went to me for info..."

"If you're asking if I'm worried about you telling them something that they can use against me, no. I trust you, so I don't have to worry about that. If you're asking if I'm worried in general, ehh...kind of. Not really though. I'm sure everything's going to be fine."

"You better n-not die..." He mumbled. 

"I won't, babe. I can't just leave you like that. That would be so cruel of me."

Kokichi smiled at me, burying his face into me once again. "I love you..." He muttered into my shirt.

"I love you too, my dear."

His eyes started to close. I guess there isn't much to do when you're shut inside other than sleep. He seems to have tired himself out from ranting. Seeing him nuzzle into me made my lips curl into a fond, wide smile. 

I remembered all the times I watched him fall asleep on me before. He'd mumble an "I love you" before his eyes closed. His soft smile would slowly disappear, replaced by a content, innocent expression. Sometimes his lips would part and a small bit of drool would fall out of his mouth. I'd wipe it off, trying my best not to wake him. Most of the time, he'd have nightmares. Recently, though, his sleep has been incredibly peaceful.

I couldn't help but fantasize about the future. We'd both get out of the game, and I'd be able to finally ask him if he would be my boyfriend. We've been putting it off because we didn't want to date, and then get our heart broken that much more if one of us dies. But in my fantasy, we'd be compensated greatly for our survival, and we'd live wealthy, carefree lives together. The police would have no choice but to arrest his foster mother for abuse, and she'd never, ever hurt my Kichi ever again. We'd cuddle just like this until we grow old and weary, our tired bones content with our love. 

And if one of us dies...well, that's where the despair comes in. I grinned. The despair of losing the other would be maddening. We'd cry and lash out, most likely killing a few people or ourselves. Maybe we'd be put in a hospital, or audition to become the mastermind of the next game, causing that much more despair for others, until we're eventually killed for our crimes against humanity. Just like Junko Enoshima wanted.

But of course, I'd never want my beloved to feel any despair. That's why I have to live. That's why...if one of us dies, it would be him. After all, he won't have to feel despair over my death if he dies. I want to save him from any despair. I want his life to be wonderful until the end. 

I don't want him to die. But I refuse let him feel despair. I'd gladly suffer without him if it means that he won't have to feel the despair of losing me. The depressive, almost suicide-inducing state you get after losing someone you love. 

I won't let my Kichi feel that despair.

My terrible thoughts clouded my brain.

I truly am twisted. I thought as I fell asleep next to him.