WHEN YOU LOVE

HIS BOLLOCKS

The couple went home together, but the lukewarm ambiance remained.

Dylan bailed out on them after the evening meal. The reigning tension reminded the boy of moments he wished never to live again.

"Are you okay, Dylan?" Candy asked when she found the boy sitting on her doorstep. She crouched down to sit next to him.

"I'm not okay," Dylan said and laid his head on her shoulder.

It was the deal. They wouldn't pretend or lie about their mental state. Roleplay and lies were what destroyed the love crop where ever it sprung.

The teens preferred to do without the artifice. It was tough at times to put oneself out there and show vulnerability, but sometimes it was the only way to obtain comfort.

Back at home, Lee wondered if it wasn't the moment to tell Sana the actual reason behind his unconsolable fury.

The man who detested lies found himself trembling in front of his own revelation. Yet Sana had to know, not only because he loved her but also because it concerned their future.

"Sana, can we have a word, please?"

"Oh, what's with the formal stance? I thought you wished for me to forget the incident," the woman teased despite herself.

"I know I did. It's about something else."

"Can't it wait? I don't know why, but I feel it's something I don't want to hear," Sana said as she observed the man's solemn expression.

"No, it can't wait. It's important."

The man took Sana by the hand and led her to the sofa.

"What's the matter, Lee?"

"Eh, it's something not easy to say," Lee sought his words for the first time since Sana knew him. He caressed her hand, "IㅡI never thought I'd need to say or explain this to anyone."

Sana sat up; the hour seemed grave.

"I know you think I overreacted," Lee began, "I have no excuse. My behavior was intolerable. Still, I want you to know why because you have to."

"Are you sick?" Sana asked.

"No, no, I'm not. I almost wish I was; things would be easier."

"Please don't joke like that, Lee. You're scaring me."

Sana wondered what the man had to say. She had never seen him like this. The man appeared aged by the matter.

"I'm not sick, but I ㅡ let's say I have a condition," Lee pursued

Sanas' brows crossed, "What do you mean by a condition?"

Lee took a deep breath before saying, "I don't know where to start."

They had just moved in together and barely laid the foundations of their relationship. Lee couldn't believe he was blowing a whistle on himself.

"I can't have childrenㅡat least I can't anymore."

In front of Sanas' bewildered stare, the man explained.

"Dylan was a surprise. Camille and I quickly got hitched. Building a family was important for me, and I thought it was what she wanted when the truth was Camilleㅡ."

Lee paused as he tried to find the memories and words to formulate the tale accurately.

"I asked her if we could have another child. Camille categorically refused. She had complications with taking oral contraception and implantable contraception. We were a married couple. It was unthinkable to have sex with a condom till death do us part. I respected her choice not to have children, and she challenged me. If I wanted unprotected sex, there weren't many options."