( Bang Chan + Lee Felix )
❝Teach me how to love, without lust...❞
┈┈ mistopher | 2021 ++
Satyriasis; uncontrollable sexual desire in a man. Sex addiction, a mental illness just like the rest, yet so overlooked.
So what is Bang Chan to do when all...
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┈ ┈ ┈ ⋞ 〈 ❄️ 〉 ⋟ ┈ ┈ ┈
⇛ M&J Psychology Clinic 1:10pm
Pouting at the assertive look lingering on the taller's face, Changbin shook his limbs childishly and defiantly, looking down to avoid locking eyes with the younger and possibly pissing himself in public. "Do I really have to do this, Innie? You're really making me regret telling you everything."
"Now no one forced you to open up to me like that," Jeongin spoke lowly, back pressed against the wall of the building and arms folded against his chest. "There's good in you, Changbin, and I can see it. You just need to make things right with the people you hurt, and then things will fall into place for you," he shrugged, cocking his head to the side and smiling softly. "Felix will be coming out any minute now. And as for Chan, if you still insist on not going to his place, I guess you can find him by asking Felix since he doesn't work at the café anymore."
"But can't we just- F-Felix," Changbin gulped, conscience quaking from overpowering guilt when he met the gaze of the one that he had hurt so selfishly not too long aback. But amongst all the times that he had contact with Felix after their breakup; from that heartbreaking morning, to their quarrel at the clinic, to their distanced meeting at the café... Changbin's eyes held a new level of sincerity- a level that Felix didn't think a "heartless" man like him could possess.
Glancing at an attentive Jeongin and then back at his ex, Felix tilted his head, double-checking the time on his phone and smiling at a text from his boyfriend before speaking. "Changbin? Can I... help you?"
"I wanted to talk, Felix. And I promise it's nothing bad... I just need to clear up some things," the older fiddled with the paws of his sweater, turning to view the contented expression on his partner's face to fuel his words further. "So could you spare me like five minutes of your time? Right here?"
"Okay?"
"Lix, I just wanted to say sorry," Changbin sniffled quietly, the widespread gathering of words in his mind somewhat overwhelming as they only skipped and stumbled over one another due to uncontrollable excitement at the fact that they were so, so close to the freedom that they had restlessly tormented for.
They wanted to run wild and flood the ears of the taller; they wanted to tickle his freckles with tears that'd escape his eyes when the pure genuineness would sound through their every syllable. But most importantly, they wanted to be expressed so that the very person responsible for their dispensation would be proud- be overwhelmed with satisfaction- be willing to give the shorter another long term, dedicated shot at a successful love life.
"Sorry?"
"Yes, Felix. I hurt you, and I know I did. I c-cheated on you, and I pre-planned leaving you. I-I tried to force sex upon you, and I didn't appreciate just your presence in my life," Changbin looked down, containers of shame unable to prevent their ship from docking in his own head, the guilt slowly easing itself through a few tears. "I'm not asking you for a second chance, don't get me wrong. But I just needed to apologize. Especially when I lied to Chan about you being the one who hurt me. And when I confronted you about liking him- and for seducing him just so you two wouldn't have a chance... I'm sorry, Lix. I'm genuinely sorry, for what I did to you. And I just hope that you could forgive me? We don't have to be friends, but I just want to know that I'm forgiven."
