Deceitful (A Naruto Fanfic)

Chapter 65: Sakura

Thanks for bearing with me, friends. Only a chapter or two left before the end of this book and a potential re-write. From junior high to my grad program, it's been a wild ride. I'm sorry it's taken so long to write, but regardless I'm glad we're here.
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Yamanaka-san had an unreadable expression cross his features as I finished recounting the morning's events.

"How do you feel?"

"I'm pretty happy, actually. Happier than I thought I would be."

He made no comment and sat quietly with his hands folded. He wanted an elaboration of some kind. I almost smiled at the familiarity of the gesture. We'd finally reached the point to where I could understand his tells. If that didn't shout growth, I don't know what did.

I sighed quietly, wrapping up my inner monologue and bringing myself back to the topic at hand— happiness.

There was no doubt that this was the happiest I had been in some time. I wasn't sure if the
common denominator was the absence of life-and-death missions or the presence of Kakashi.

I felt myself frowning slightly at only having the two possible answers.

"I guess I'm still waiting for something to confirm my fear that things won't be alright after all." I admitted, looking away from his fixed gaze. I focused instead on his hands, which began to tap thoughtfully across his desk.

"It still could be cyclical, you know." Yamanaka-san replied as he sunk further back into his chair.

"My anxiety already beat you to that conclusion.
If this is all cyclical, I just have to wait and see if we end up back at square one." I reasoned.

"Won't that hurt?"

"Not if the alternative happens." I answered immediately, knowing that he was trying to shake loose my newfound optimism in order to protect me.

Yamanaka-san didn't want me to get hurt again but he'd seriously have to give me some credit.

Even naive girls like me could learn from the past.

Yamanaka-san's voice was calm as he continued his questioning.

"What supports your reasoning? Your faith in him?"

"Yes, but it's not blind. There's trust here too-- makes a difference when it comes to the permanence of action." I spoke, taking care to think of things holistically now that I was away from the Copy-nin and the endorphins he caused.

We were both taking all the right steps in moving forward. Wrongs were recognized, and promises to do better were sworn.

Only time could tell the rest.

And as much as it bothered me that there wasn't some sort of binding measure of certainty that we wouldn't travel down this road again, I had to take solace in the fact that our current actions now were going to be enough to disrupt the ingrained cycle of confusion and distrust.

They had to be enough.

I didn't have it in me to deal with what would come after if they weren't.

I exhaled loudly, my head hanging low at that realization. Maybe I was just desperately hanging onto the belief that change could happen because I needed it to for my own sake.

A quiet laugh from the blond across from me drew me from my thoughts.

"No need to look so down, Sakura. I was simply trying to do my job in making sure you weren't just riding the high of conflict resolution."