The Boys Who Never Existed (One Direction Fan Fiction)

Chapter 21

I shouldn't fee like this. I have absolutely no right to be jealous of her when I told him we couldn't be together. I should not be upset, hurt and feel anything but happiness for him, he had found his soul mate, but I still felt as if it should  have been me instead. 

Is this what it's supposed to feel like? Love. I don't think it's supposed to feel anything like this. Sure, I felt the butterflies, light headiness and laughed like I've never laughed before but surely it can't goa way that fast....can it? I would love to think that this is all just some long important life lesson, something like 'never fall for the guy you can't have' or 'never date a super famous pop star without asking your mom first' but neither of those seemed to be what was being taught to me right now. All I knew was that it hurt, and that I wanted it to end. As soo as possible. 

I stared at the ceiling above my bed as I pulled the covers closely to my body. I had been trying to sleep for almost five hours and it was already three in the morning. I sighed, knowing I was going no where with my useless attempts. 

I got up out of my bed and walked over to my suitcase, taking off my worn sweatpants and putting on some jeans and a sweatshirt over my white tank top. I pulled my hair into a ponytail grabbed my wallet and quietly snook out of my bedroom and out of the hotel room. I needed time to think, and I needed to go to the one place where I felt at home.

I walked down the little brick sidewalk watching my feet as I walked. It was still dark out but the shopes that lined the sidewalk lit the way for me as I continued to walk until I stopped in front of the book store I had seen on our way to the hotel. 

Yes, I may be dorky and pathetic for loving book stores but I do. I love the feeling of anticipation as you turn the page knowing something amazing or horrible was about to happen to one of the characters, how I would stop and look up, putting my hands to my face my jaw hanging loose after reading the plot twist or something so sweet because I was that amazed by how the words made me feel. 

I loved book stores. 

I walked into the store, letting the cold air sweep in. I loved the fact that all the stores down here int he downtown were still open at this time of night. I had always been a night owl.

I walked over to one of the book racks skimming over to books when I saw 'Gone With The Wind' my favorite book of all time. I picked it up and brought it up to an older woman at the counter. 

The woman looked about maybe late sixties. She had a friendly look about her and her eyes were the kind that you knew had been through hell and back. She was wearing a creme sweater and jeans.

She looked up at me and gave me a sweet smile when I put the book down. I reached fro my wallet but her hand landed on mine stopping me. I looked back up at her confused.

"Don't worry about it honey" She said pushing the book towards me, "It's all set" She finished. Before I could say it was fine and I didn't mind she had walked away and into an office behind the counter. I smiled to myself, realizing that she knew I was upset. I smiled to myself as I walked over to the book store cafe in the back and got a coffee before sitting down at a table for two. 

Across the cafe from me was a middle aged man reading and a younger woman around twenty-five typing quickly at her laptop. Definitely a writer, I thought to myself. 

As I got more and more into the book I had read a thousand and one times I felt the table shift an inch as someone sat down across from me. I looked up wondering if Niall or Zayn had followed me here, knowing they could see right through me. But instead I saw my first familiar face since I let the U.S. 

"Max?" I said, looking at him up and down, making sure I wasn't just imagining him. He smiled back at me and gestured to the book. 

"Are you reading that again?" He asked me. I nodded holding my head up high as if I deserved some medal for it. He laughed and I put dog-eared the page I was on and put down the book. 

Max. Max was a big part of my life a couple years ago. He was my best friend and I could tell him anything. He had moved to Canada a year and a half after we met, and that was always hard, losing your best friend.

"So um...Why are you in U.K? I thought you guys moved to Canada?" I asked him.

"Mom wanted to travel, she always does. But, I couldn't sleep so I decided to take a walk and I stopped in here and saw you" He told me. I smiled.

"I've really missed you Max" I told him. "I've really missed you too" He replied. 

I couldn't help but remember the little crush I had had on him years ago. I mean, any girl couldn't resist him. He had the bad boy look with his shaggy dark brown hair and deep brown eyes. He was tall and a six pack had been forming before, you could only hope he had one now. He had a warm smile that just invited you in and no girl could resist.

Except me, I was in love with someone else. 

I looked down at my phone that sat on the table and saw that it was almost eight.

"Well, I have to go" I told him, wishing I could stay but knowing the boys would be up soon. He frowned which made me smile, remembering all the fun times we used to have.

"Well, here, I'll give you my number in case you ever wanna um..get together" I said awkwardly, not knowing if we weren't close enough to hang out anymore.

"Yeah, Definitely. I'll call you" He told me. 

I smiled at him before walking out the door of the coffee shop and back onto the cold street. I walked back into the hotel and into the hotel room before plopping down on the couch and started to finish my book.

Any predictions? VOTE AND COMMENT PRETTY PLEASE! 

-Courtney XX